Re-birthed Final Hate Can Also Be Love
by Infamouskid
Summary: Death was easy, never existing was easy, living was hard. Forgotten memories is like taking a soul away from a body. Shinji Ikari is that husk. With his memories gone, Shinji must conquer the unknown and push ahead. To undo the sacrifices of the many, Shinji must undo the sins of the broken. The plan is forgotten, but not lost. Time is of the essence. A redhead girl is an obstacle.
1. Forgotten Memories

Hello! This is the author talking here, and who else would it be? So to play it short, this is my first public Fanfic. I'm not sure really what to say, so I'm going to leave an awkward pause here (" _Awkward pause"_ ). Joking aside though, I am so grateful that you took the time to read this story. Go you! You deserve a handshake or something for this...So till next time. See ya!

Guide: Inner thoughts. 'Mind talk' "Regular talk" **BOLD WORDS.**

 **Disclaimer** ; I do not own any of the characters or plot elements from Gainax, all and similar pieces are used by chance. This story is made for entertainment purposes.

* * *

 **Chapter One - Forgotten Memories**

Blurry scenes. Grey hair. Short blue silky hair. Two pairs of red, piercing eyes. The smell of the Nerv Bathhouses. Blood came. Tears wept. Shame felt. Pain wellknown. Guilt thrown. His Eva & Angels. Lilith & Adam. The start of something new. Nothing.

* * *

The feeling of nothing. Dark silence penetrated every pore of this universe. A single person floated in eternal emptiness.

'Am I dead?' It seemed to be alive at the very least, and asking questions was at the forefront of its mind.

Akin to being washed away by a flowing river, body numb to the ripples, mind not knowing where it heads. It cleanses the heart, but scares the mind. Closer inspection showed that the person was a young boy, most likely to be in his teenage years.

'How can I be sure I'm dead? Where does my body start and where does it stop? What exactly is making me feel this?'

Again, the boy couldn't feel anything, as if he had lost his body, but kept his mind collected. He felt as if he was truly alone in this place, the only thing that seem to function was his sight, he could see shadows and particles moving around him. 'I can't see.' The boy finally realized he was engulfed in blackness. 'Help!' 'Help!' 'HELP!' ' **HELP!** '

'...'

'Somebody just please save me…' Nobody answered the boy's calls, he just quit trying altogether. Horrifying parts of his mind tortured him, making him relive the moments that led up to this. He thought things would be different after he took this chance, but he was wrong. Horribly wrong.

'This reminds me of the Dilac Sea, instead of forever white, it's black.I wonder if mother will show up and talk to me? … Misato is probably on the other side, waiting for me to be rescued, and Asuka is getting irritated that I can't cook and clean for her.She's a lost cause. Misato should scold me, but she won't. Asuka will punish me, with no care in the world. … I wonder if this was planned by my father too. That bastard,he never cared for me.' I'm causing more trouble than I'm worth right now. … I'll have to apologize to all my friends when I get back.

*Sigh*

'I'm sorry everyone...'

* * *

Time passed, and the person held there suffered at their isolation. The boy thought he had been screaming for hours, but he had no content of time, so he really didn't know how long ago he quit and gave up for help. He just drifted around like this for awhile. 'Is this my punishment for doing what everyone told me to?Why did I deserve this?! What happened? Why does everything feel fuzzy!?' Frustration poured out of the boy, there was nothing to take it out on, so he quelled it for now. The boy started to cry, not knowing what to do with himself, but suddenly the tension shifted, he felt for the first time as if things changed. He couldn't describe it, because he still had no feeling, but something was different. He stopped crying and once again spoke out.

'Hello?' The boy asked carefully.

…

Yet the sound only hit dull nothing, reminding the captor of his task. The young brown haired boy started to shake, not due to experiencing nothing, but left alone when he had been promised that things would be altered. He attempted another time at communication.

'Anyone THERE?!'

…

Once again silence greeted the traveler, basking him in solitude. The boy's temper started to bubble, making him angry at everything, and nothing at all.

'This is _your_ fault! I was just used, nothing more than a toy to people!' I never received what should have been mine!' His words that aimed at the darkness cut nobody, yet his angry words were fruitful in someway. A moment passed before sound was directed at him.

'Then what did those people do to you then if not help Shinji-kun?' Ikari was shocked, a voice! Finally something or someone came to help him! The voice carried no physical body though, it instead stuck to the darkness surrounding Shinji. Shinji didn't wait for a reply and unsteadily answered.

'They wanted me for their plans! For revenge! For self purpose! For answers!' He yelled into the void, not sure where to direct his anger at.

'They did what exactly as you did, as all people do. People use each other to support one's mind, it has always been like such for the Lilith.' The voice told boldly of everything, carrying more wisdom of words than humanly possible.

'I just wanted to find something, to make it worth the pain!'

'Life is pain Shinji, learn now. All Lilith do not make promises on the words of themselves. Their minds change as much at their mortal bodies, this path is gourged in sorrow, because it is an uncertain one. This is why I gave you the chance to make this world a better place for yourself.' 'Now go.'

...

'What does it know anyway, a voice that tells me psychological meaning? It doesn't really know what I've felt inside.' Images passed of the battles with Angels, being burned in LCL, being mutilated, having your Eva hurt your very friends, Evas brought nothing but pain and suffering! More images passed of a fiery red head girl, a raven haired woman, a blue silk covered head that bore red eyes, and many more followed.

'Nobody understood me, and I couldn't understand them.It was better to keep to myself.' But...but was it the _right thing to do_? Yes! 'Yes it was, it saved me from unnecessary pain! Pain that was too much for me to handle!'

'You're wrong Shinji.'

'Huh? What do you want, what do you care?' Shinji had enough of this. He held no care for the voice anymore.

'I care for all Lilith, and you so much more than that.' The statement came out as bold, Shinji probably would have blushed in the situation, but he still felt nothing, not even his skin picked up on the environment he was in.

'Who are you? An angel?

…

'God even?'

The voice, for once, broke character and let out a whimsical laugh that lasted for a few short seconds. A laugh that only confused Shinji Ikari even more.

'I'm nothing of the sort, but you among all should realize who I am, and what me and my peers have planned to protect you and the future of mankind.'

'Who is this person? I feel like I should know who it is, but I can't get a grasp. My mind feels like mush, and my memories are starting to fog. Oh god, what's happening to me?' The voice settled back into character. It acted as if everything was foreseeable and knew every step to take. It took a second to control itself, then released soughtful infused words.

'Be prepared now.' It spoke a pre warning, one that spoke of the heavy situation at hand. For a few seconds of barren emptiness no concern for words, or actions were needed, then it hit. A dim light could be seen emerging at one side of the darkness, if the darkness did have sides that is, distracting Shinji from his thoughts. He saw that he was fully clothed in his school outfit, but that wasn't the only thing going on. Shinji finally felt his body, he could move his fingers and know what the touch of skin brushing skin was again. But the feelings quickly left, as if he had no privilege to him. Instead pain coursed through him now, and it was not pleasant. A dull pain at first quickly erupted into blistering hot pain surging along his body, replacing the calm atmosphere with grunts and calls of suffering. His spine buckled under the pressure, all of his limbs were erratic, he lowered his head to his palms to feel some closure within himself. He couldn't help but scream out in pain.

'Nghh **AWWWWWWWWWWW** hhmakeit **ahhhhhh** stop **!** '

'Sorry Shinji this is the price for sacrifice _you_ paid.' This was all it spoke. 'Good for nothing voice, telling me these insightful things, but not even making an effort to help me at all!' Shinji was assaulted with another wave of pain, it radiated from him, making the area close to him hostile and dangerous. It never ceased to slow down at all, he knew if this kept going he **would break down**. He had no acceptance of this striking, red hot distress, but he had no idea of what to do either. As one final attempt, he pleaded for it to stop, to make it go away.

' **AGGGGhhhpleasepleasepleasestop!…'**

The pain lessened, as if his request had the power for it to listen. Soon more light flooded the darkness, opening up what was concealed in shadow. Shinji finally stopped screaming, keeping it to just grunts as the pain slowed, but quickly noticed something more frightening. The Earth. He could see it, and he could see the stars surrounding it and the Sun off in the distance. The only thing that was missing was the moon. It was if it was hidden the whole time, just caked away with some allusion and tricks. That meant he had to be in space or something right? But Shinji noticed he hadn't taken a single breath in the whole argument. Actually, he never even spoken a word in the argument, it was taking place all in his mind.

What else seemed peculiar was that something was edging on the Earth. It started to spread around, the qualities of it were something of a fire, but it was blazing white, and eating away at the Earth looked like it's job. Countries and oceans started to disappear. Water evaporated and lands burned bright of the hellish fire. Chunks of the Earth started to go missing too, they either totally went missing from sight, or started to float away from Earth.

'Am I dreaming? This all had to be a dream right? I can't decide, the pain is too real for it to be a dream.'

'This is real life, expect the worst, and the best of things to clash at the same time, like a wave of emotions with no stop. That is what Lilith call "living".'

Everything was going on too fast. He was dealing with isolation, confusing words, pain, heartache, It was his life. He was reliving his days all in an instant flash. Shinji could hear a low rumble, as if something was off in the distance.

'It can't be possible, I'm in space, I shouldn't be able to hear anything. What is this reality?' The rumbling stopped, suddenly things came crashing down. That was when the screaming started again, except it was Shinji screaming this time. The screams from millions of people began invading Shinji's mind, making it feel as if multiple razors touched his brain. He couldn't bare it. He could hear children crying, kids yelling, adults bowling in terror, people dying, it sounded like death and rebirth itself.

'NononoNoNoNoNONO **NOOOOOO**!'

'Why is _this_ happening to _me_?!' The boy asked again but still received no answer.

He felt warm liquid roll down his cheek. The boy lifted his hand up to his face to check for tears, his eyes gazed at the hand that had just touched. Crimson red stared back at him. He was crying blood. The voices and screaming were at the back of his mind now, he had a bigger issue to deal with. He was shocked to say the least, unable to stop the flow, he grabbed the shirt he had on and used it to stop the bleeding. After careful minutes of wiping Shinji noticed that the voices had stopped, he didn't know what was happening. He checked his surroundings, but saw nothing. The earth was gone, he saw as one last bit of the white flames consumed a piece of land, after a second of having no fuel left, it burnt out. All that remained in sight was the Sun and the stars. They looked eternal as ever, flowing in neverending glory.

'What type of god would do this?' It was just a humble whisper in his mind, but it spoke as if announced by yelling.

'This is not the work of a god Shinji, this is the attempt at power through the efforts of Lilith. If the Lilith can see anything in their grasp, they will put their whole body, soul, and mind into claiming what they think should be theirs. It is a pitiful way to bring them closer to one another, but sometimes it only ends in pain. You know of what I speak of, do you not, Shinji Ikari?

These words rang hard within Shinji's head, giving him the mental images of Asuka, Misato, Rei, and even his father sprang up.

'Now make haste, we do not have much time.'

The voice commanded dryly, the words held deep meaning for the speaker. Shinji started to float, unable to drive where he was heading, he let himself just go. He did notice that he was heading to where the light was the brightest though. What had just transpired had pushed his brain to the limit, he couldn't make odds or ends of it, so he pushed everything away. He just wanted it to stop. He could feel that he was starting to be consumed, but he didn't care anymore. 'Maybe this is the end. Maybe this is how I die.'

'No. The world has bigger plans for you. Just wait and see.'

'Um, t-thank you. I'm s-s-sorry for what happened. Even if I don't know who you are, the ending of my life will be appreciated.' There was a brief awkward pause before the entity answered him. The tension changed with its speech, it was thick and heavy with confusion. A knife wouldn't have been able to cut the air. Well it _wouldn't_ be able to, since there was no air in space.

' **NO WAIT!** If you do not remember me, then you do not remember _the plan_!' Whoever the voice was couldn't stop what was about to transpire next. Nothing had the power to stop the process that so many lives had taken a toll for. As planned Shinji passed through the portal, but what was unaccounted for was that Shinji suffered memory loss from what had occurred recently.

* * *

The portal swallowed Shinji whole, pushing him down a long white tube. The tube felt like it was ever flowing, making him to believe he was like a rock in a river, slowly sinking to the bottom of the abyss. It sounded like rushing water and the experience of falling mixed together. Time was deemed irrelevant by the passage, for what could time do there? The pause grew evermore in the prison. Nothing took place for the longest time. The boy decided it was the best time as any to relax.

* * *

Chapter One - Neither Night Nor Day

The tube was occupied by other things than the boy. For great periods of time, pictures and visions mosied by. Still images passed by now, some contained him fighting the angels, others had him looking at people he talked to everyday. A picture of his mother came along, giving Shinji a brief glimpse at her.

'Mother?' Yet it too was swept away by the rush, never to be witnessed another time by Shinji in his whole life, not ever. One showed Misato kissing Shinji in a long hallway, most likely a Nerv hallway. After she drew her face away from she spoke sweet nothings into his ear. An elevator door opened for him, and he limbered into the waiting elevator. He saw it, but paid no attention to it. When did he ever get a kiss from Misato? This all seemed strange to him, he felt like a movie was playing for him. The movie only contained what he ever encountered, and he thought that maybe his wishes were in it also. Rei were briefly in some. Shinji blocked those images out, he knew the truth of Rei, and he took no effort in confronting it. His father appeared multiple times, but he looked all but the same in everyone of them. He wore a mask, the perfect poker face, nobody, not even his own son could get a read on the Commander's thoughts. Shinji just wanted the images to stop, but the passage had one more show planned for him yet. Asuka flew by in a scene, she was yelling at him, her words were muted, carrying no weight to him. They had an argument around the table in Misato's house. Now Shinji was yelling at her, she shot a comeback and pushed Shinji! What was happening? What caused this argument? Shinji never acted like this before in his life, he never had so much anger and sadness on his face like the Shinji in the picture had. Image Shinji laid on the ground, hot coffee spilled on him when he fell. Now he got up, whispering something to Asuka, but real Shinji couldn't make it out. The image Shinji advanced on Asuka and stopped in front of her. Ikari's hands shot up and started to wrap his hands around her throat, lifting her off the ground with his strength. Real Shinji couldn't bare it anymore, he closed his eyes and waited for it to pass. More of Asuka went by Shinji after a while, he didn't want to see the images, they only brought pain to Shinji's mind. But there was a pause in the flow, Shinji opened his eyes once more. Shinji froze at what floated in front of him. This was one of the moments where he had gotten close to the Second Child.

It was them kissing. Shinji moved over to Asuka like she asked of him. They were about to kiss when it looked like Asuka was waiting for him to move, he never did, despite her patience. She pinched his nose and commenced the empty, bored battle. The kiss was all over in an instant, except it didn't move away like the others, it stayed right there. The image followed Asuka instead, she quickly entered the bathroom right after the kiss. Shinji thought he would see disgust on her face, like always how the scene moved in his head, but it changed. Pain. Pain and suffering was on Asuka's face, showing Shinji something he couldn't believe in. He had hurt the Second Child somehow, he had hurt Asuka with his actions. She quit making sounds and turned off the water. She put on a mask Shinji had never saw before. She, she was hiding her feelings to Shinji. Why? Why, she could have said something to him, but she didn't. Shinji's mind realized an important fact, in that moment Asuka had reminded Shinji of himself. She never clearly told her feelings to anyone, it reminded him of himself. It put a pit of guilt in the boy's stomach. Shinji had taken so much in, he allowed himself to close off the pain for now, allowing it to fester deeper. A single tear rolled down his cheek.

"I'm sorry Asuka."

Shinji acquired in his gut that the end was soon, he looked at the end of the tube and saw a plain white bed far away. He closed his eyes and waited for anything to happen. The sound was hushed, letting nothing pass by. It continued like this until Shinji discovered a new sensation. Shinji felt warmth on his back, he was about to speak when whatever was behind took the chance before him.

"Hehe, all you do is apologize idiot…." The sentence held a tone of passion, but carried something along the lines of tired frustration; no sooner as the words were spoken, the feeling of warmth left. The boy just waited in silence, and settled his eyes shut for the last time. He did note that the smell of strawberries were surrounding him now.

"Thank you, Asuka." The boy took one final breath, even if he had no reason at all, it still made him feel wholesome. Whatever was left of Shinji's conscious was eaten away, all the important details to him were all saved, they would soon be repressed and stored away. The end of the tunnel was nearby, showing the same bed, faint squeaking of wheels and alarms sounded from the end, signalling it was getting to the point of Shinji.

The boy drifted in white, awaiting for what was coming next.

* * *

A single boy was dreaming on a bed, lost in the clouds.

'Ughhh.' The boy awoke from his sleep. 'My head...feels...so foggy...'

'Maybe I slept too long here.'

'Wait, _where am I_? 'I...don't know how I got _here_.

'...'

'W-what's that smell?' It...it smells like sanitation….' A flash image of baths and grey hair crossed his mind. Shinji raised his hand to caress the hair on his head.

'...Am...I in a hospital?' A bathhouse even? 'Did I get hurt?' Come on, _remember_ Shinji!' The boy was in deep thinking, wondering what had transpired that he would turn up feeling alone. All he knew was that he laying on some kind of bed. His forehead had formed a scowl from this type of thinking. After all the thinking, he reached an almost certain conclusion. 'My body feels like lead. I had to be in an accident to feel like this, maybe someone has answers. I should get up and look around.' The boy cast open eyes to see an unfamiliar ceiling, it tugged at his mind for some reason, but he gave it no thought. Around him was plain hospital junk, an IV drip, a heart monitor, and the usual TV remote. Windows were off to the left side, no visitors chairs were in the room, and a TV was placed on the wall straight ahead of him. Except the TV looked _too_ flat. It was meant to be a box TV to Shinji, but it looked weird to his eyes. Actually the more Shinji pondered it, the more he thought a lot of the technology in the room was more advanced than he remembered it.

'Maybe I'm just going crazy, it's always been like this…' Besides his head, the boy was fine and healthy, his parched throat had another opinion though.

"I."

"Need."  
"Water."

There was a small glass of water on the table near him. Shinji had to lean over to the table to grab it, almost enough to make him fall off the bed. He recovered, and noticed the cup about to fall on the ground and shatter from his failed attempt to grab it. "No, stop!" He still reached for the cup before its imminent demise. The cup stopped a few inches from the ground. The water sloshed over from the sudden stop.

"What is this?" Shinji had to close his eyes for a second. He couldn't believe this! He thought he was just seeing stuff, and it had to be just a prank one of the nurses were playing. He brought his hands up to wipe his eyes. In mid wipe Shinji heard glass breaking below him. He peered over the edge of the bed and broken glass was scattered on the floor. "Yeah, maybe I did just imagine the whole thing."

'Wait back on topic, _why_ am I even in here? I need to leave.' Shinji hopped out of bed on the safe side. No need to have glass in his feet now. The IV needle swayed with the movement of his arm. Shinji knew this was going to hurt, but he had to get rid of it. He didn't want to drag around a pole on wheels. So with a gasp of air he attacked the needle and ripped it out of his underarm. It begun to bleed red from the injection site and stream down his arm. He managed to stop the bleeding with the white bed sheets. The only clothing on him was a regular hospital gown. He searched, but there was no other collection of clothing in the room. The boy gave up and went towards the door. He opened it and exited the room. The hallway had no patients, even regular nurses and doctors that stationed there were gone.

'Okay, just look for somebody and they'll help me. Right?' The boy called out. "Hello?"

" **...** " Nobody answered. Shinji waited by his door for somebody to come at him.

When no answer came, Shinji went to investigate on his own. Every Other room must have been left alone. The place was desolate and in need of care. It started to creep Shinji out. The faint hum of cicadas chirped outside the windows, making the floor give the impression of emptiness. He found the nurses station down the hallway to the left. Nobody was in it, and the place seemed even more empty now. A green sign that hung from the ceiling read "A Wing. Division 1". Tape held down a white note on the counter, Shinji inched over to it and read it outloud.

"Young boy stormed into C wing this morning, demanding to see his little sister…. Surgeon delivered the news and boy went on a rampage…. Accidentally hurt 2 nurses. Guards restrained him minutes later and evicted him off the grounds…. All nurses go to D wing for support…."

Shinji grabbed the paper and crumbled it out of anger. So what, did they forget about him, just abandoning him here to defend for himself!? He needed some answers, and he wanted them now. Shinji needed to find material, anything at all, to locate an exit of some kind. He started by rummaging through the hospital drawers behind the nurses station. They only kept personal items in the drawers. Handbags, wallets, keys, but nothing to help Shinji with his problem. He moved over to the computer on the desk for answers. They must have either left in a hurry, or kept no passwords on the computers. Shinji spent a few minutes in the files looking for help. He spotted a file labeled "Fire emergency directions." The fire hospital guide on the desktop said that if Shinji went down a flight of stairs, and turned left at the doors, the main entrance was down the hall. He left for it right away. The boy sprung up from the chair, dashed down the hallway, and found the stairs. Making sure to not break his neck on the steps, he walked slow. Walking out from the door of the stairway and onto the floor, Shinji recognized what to be the exit, except there was a problem. Two burly men in black suits guarded the door. At the sound of his footsteps, the men turned and gazed at Shinji. They noted the patient and the man on the right reached for his pocket. 'Oh crap, he might have a weapon. I need to leave and find another way.' The man brought out a tiny device. Shinji thought it kinda resembled a communication device people in the military used. The man spoke into the strange device.

"Bravo, the target is at the west entrance. Retrieving now." After he finished talking, the men glanced at each other and both nodded. They started walking at Shinji, menacing and stalky. "Come here kid, we need ya'."

Shinji started to back away. He had a fear of what they were going to do with him. He wanted answers, he didn't want to be taken away. "I'm good, thank you very much for the offer." They were advancing to Shinji faster than he expected.

Shinji was about to turn around and run when the one with the walkie-talkie grabbed his wrist forcefully. "You are coming with us." His words were commanding. Shinji had to shout back to make himself clear. "No I'm not!"

"Stop being a brat!" The other man spoke up this time, once again making Shinji feel like he was trapped.

"I. Said. No!" With his free hand Shinji pushed the guard in the chest, trying to force him away. Shinji felt a wave flow in his hand, the guard flew into the air and hit the main desk a couple feet away. As soon as he landed his body went limp from the impact. The guard that was close to Shinji backed away and went for his friend on the desk. "Spike! Are you okay?" The man in black bent over and shook his friend, to much of his effort, the guard was still knocked out. Shinji seized the opportunity and ran for the exit.

"No, come back!" The remaining guard yelled at him, but nothing could stop Shinji. He was free! He had finally made it outside, now he could start looking for answers that his mind couldn't come up with right now. The doors suffled open automatically when he came close, letting him get a peak of the world. He ran past the alarms signaling the escape of a patient, he just needed to be farthest away from this place currently. Outside was different than he thought it to be. It wasn't as if everything changed, no, it had to be the blue sport car blocking his escape. A lone woman with a red jacket and purple hair stepped out and walked in the direction of Shinji.

"Oh my darling son, come to me, I'll take you away from the bad men!" Shinji couldn't believe his eyes or ears, his mother had drove to the hospital to save him. He really didn't think she looked like mother material, but to him, a helping hand was all he wanted. He ran to her and when they met, they embraced in a deep hug. She pressed his head against her breasts, Shinji felt the peaks through the jacket even. He returned the affection by giving her a honest, strong hug. They stayed that way for as long as Shinji could remember. Nasty thoughts started wandering into his head. 'Wow, my mom sure does have big breas...NO WAIT!'

'I can't think of my mother like this, I'm no better than a pervert if I think about my mom like that. She does seem a little young to be a mother, maybe she had me in her teenage years. How child-like.' The woman broke silence between the two, shifting her arms a bit.

"Hey Shinji?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry for lying to you, I just needed to calm everyone down….I'm not really your mother…" Before Shinji could pull away from the embrace of the woman, he felt a prick in his arm.

"Ow!" With all his might Shinji struggled away. The woman happily broke the fast bond between the two.

"Wha, what was th-that?" Shinji's words were starting to slur in his mouth. He suddenly felt tired and numb.

"Well that was a hypodermic needle, I put a fast acting sedative into your blood so you calm down. And you fell for the trick because of my womanly charms!" She blew a kiss at Shinji, playing a game with his mind. The woman put the very needle she had injected him with back into a protective case.

Shinji tried to get frustrated, even scowl at the woman, but he couldn't. He barely supported himself as of now. He started to take a step forwards, but he tripped, slinging his body at the woman. Surprised as she was, she still caught the kid before he hit the ground. He adjusted himself to get comfortable in the woman's grasp.

"Oh, since I forgot to tell, my name is Misato Katsuragi. Nice to meet you!" The boy listened to her words right before he passed out in her arms. Misato saw that the kid had scratches all over his body. She sighed and inhaled deeply so she had the strength to pick the kid up. He really wasn't heavy for her at all, but she did study his face to make sure he was okay.

"He looks so much more peaceful when he sleeps. Poor kid, your heart probably hurts a little from the recent battles." She made sure that she had everything with her in case of emergencies. She didn't want more kid trouble today at all.

'Well, better take him to Ritsuko, or she'll get mad at me. Hehe, I wonder if he really considered I was his mom or not. Guess I'll never find out, such a shame for a cute kid too.'

The woman talked to herself while she carried the sleeping boy back into the hospital.

* * *

Shinji woke up in the same hospital room, again. It seems like the woman he met outside was a liar, probably working for the people here also. His head felt better than what it felt like the first time he got up. There was still the problem of leaving this place and looking for help, but he knew the place was a fortress. Protected by guards with weapons, and _that woman_. He would get straight up from the bed and give that woman a piece of his mind. Well he would, If he _could_ get up. His hands were leather bound to the metal frame of the bed. No matter how much effort he put into pulling and thrashing, the cuffs of leather didn't move.

"Hello, Shinji Ikari. Sleep good?" Shinji jerked his head up from his inclined bed to see a blonde woman in a lab coat. She held a clipboard and pen. She studied Shinji for a second then wrote something down on the board.

"Third Child, I asked you a question? Can you hear me? Shinji chose to ignore the woman, he still had no idea why he was here, and now a doctor was asking him questions. And who was this Third Child? Was she referring to him?

"If you can't hear me, then I'll get some paper for you to write on." She moved from her stool and headed for the desk in the room.

"Why am I here?" The doctor turned from the desk and smiled at the boy.

"So, you can hear. Great. If you're coherent enough, let's begin some questions." She headed back to the stool and took a seat.

"I want to know why I'm here." The doctor sighed at his demands. She pondered for a second and began playing with her pen.

"Well, if I tell you, you have to keep it a secret. Not just a personal secret, but a secret held by Nerv. And not keeping in line can be punished by death. Are you willing to take this risk?" Shinji was wrecked with worry. What had he done to end up here? And what was this "nerve" she talked about? Shinji couldn't think for long, the woman across the room was expecting an answer any second. He needed to make up his mind now.

"I, I promise to keep it a secret!"

"Good, now the reason you are in the hospital is for several reasons. First of all, you are part a organization called Nerv. N-E-R-V. Second. We protect humanity, but not without a cost. You are the first child to have taken a part of being a savior. Two days ago, you, Shinji Ikari, defended Tokyo 3 from what we in Nerv classify as Angels. Destroyers of humanity. The battle was extensive on your neurons and muscles, resulting in an immediate Nerv hospital treatment afterwards. You slept for two days, until you escaped from your room earlier today, this morning to be precise, and tried to leave the hospital. Now this is where the questions begin. What is the last thing you remember Shinji?" This was all quickly piled onto Shinji. So he was somehow a hero and he saved the city, but had been injured in the fight. He had so many new questions. What were the angels, how did he defend the city, _why_ did he defend the city? How did he become a part of this "Nerv"? Everything started to swirl around his mind. The doctor's hand grasped his shoulder.

"Shinji, are you okay?" It took him a second to realize that the doctor asked him a question. Everything was spinning around Shinji, the hand on his shoulder was an anchor to him right now. He peered at the doctor after his body was still. She had a name tag labeled "Dr. Akagi" above her left breast.

"Um, yes. Thank you Dr. Akagi."

"No need for formalities, call me Ritsuko."

"Thank you Ritsuko." She pulled the stool closer to the bed so that she had a seat next to Shinji. While the boy looked healthy enough to the naked eye, Ritsuko knew something was wrong with Shinji.

"Shinji, do you remember anything?" Shinji had a downcast look, he put his head down. He kept his eyes away from the doctor.

"I'm sorry, the only thing I remember is a white light."

"Okay, give me a moment." She pulled back from Shinji and jotted down something on her clipboard.

"I have a few more questions if you don't mind?'

"Um, are they required?"

"Depends if you want help or not?" She sent a irritated look at Shinji, as if he was causing a lot of trouble to the doctor.

"Okay, continue."

"So as you awakened from your room this morning, did anything unusual happen?" The vision of glass breaking sent a chill down his back, but he thought that was made up in his mind.

"No." He answered. She resumed writing on the board.

"How did you escape from your room this morning?"

"I left through the front of the room." The doctor stopped writing on the board and eyed Shinji deeply.

"Impossible, the nurses of the wing locked the door. The only way for escape was the windows, or breaking the door down." Please explain." She thought he was lying. Shinji didn't know what to tell the woman, he was telling the truth. He had no idea of what to say.

"When I went over to the door, it was unlocked. Maybe a nurse forgot to lock it?" She quit locking eyes with Shinji and went back to writing.

"Okay, why did you try to escape?"

"I didn't know where I was and I wanted some answers." The words sounded lame out of Shinji's mouth, but they were the only reason he had with him.

"Alright, that is all the questions I had prepared. I diagnose that you're suffering from a mild case of amnesia, it is common when injures to the brain occur." She set the clipboard over on the table near the bed. The doctor sat up from the stool and looked at the boy.

"I'm informed to tell you, that due to your certain situation, housing is to be provided by Nerv."

"Wait, what about my parents?" The question hung in the air, no one dared to speak for sometime. Ritsuko finally answered.

"They are both deceased, father and mother both passed away in Second Impact. But they did leave behind Nerv for us. Bless their souls." A sad face passed from Ritsuko over to Shinji. The mood was sullen because of Shinji's desired answer.

"..."

"Also, on the account of housing, a certain vile vixen has put in the paperwork to try and claim you for adoption this afternoon."

"Huh? Who?"

"Captain Katsuragi." The tone and acknowledgement held poison itself, but at the same time something Shinji couldn't place. Wait...Katsuragi, that name sounded familiar. A bubble of fear started to rise in Shinji. Ritsuko left for the door, she called out as passing through.

"Let me go fill out the rest of your paperwork and I'll get you out of those restraints when I return."

She left and walked down the hallway, but she was already out of reach of Shinji's voice. Shinji knew now. He knew the person who had that name. It was the lady that drugged him before he came into the restraints. He wanted to give the lady his fury about lying that she was his mom. But now, she _was_ going to be his mom. Shinji felt really sick inside. Not an actual sickness, but just disgust from what had gone down. He had no means of escaping though. The doctor decided it was better to leave him there. He slammed the pillow behind him with his head. There was no possible way of getting out of this. Everyone was working past him, his actions and words weren't his alone own anymore. He decided nothing could help him, so he let his head rest on the pillow. Sometimes life had a different course than expected for Shinji.

* * *

It was around twilight now, the hospital switched to night shift awhile ago and now lights illuminated the hallways. Shinji prefered that the staff keep all his lights off, the only light came from the crack in the doorway. The sound of footsteps approached the door. Shinji turned his head, he was finally ready to leave. TV soap dramas could only impress Shinji for a little while anyways. He did like his nurse though. She had a friendly atmosphere around her, and smelled faintly of lavender. Shinji knew he was being a bit creepy, but he couldn't help it. It was one of the first times somebody was being really nice to Shinji, even if it was her job. The nurse never arrived, instead a redhead with a skin tight bodysuit walked through the door. Shinji thought she looked around his age. He knew he was staring even before he realized it. Why was she wearing a bodysuit in a hospital? The entire thing held nothing to the imagination. It showed every possible curve there was to be on a girl. He finally pulled his eyes away from her curves and looked her in the eyes. She glared daggers at Shinji. The intensity was only multiplied by how pissed off her entire body seemed. Shinji tried to break the silence, maybe she was a visitor.

"Um, hello?" She stopped staring at Shinji, turned around, and locked the door from the inside.

"What are you doing?" She continued to ignore him, and chose to stay silent. The redhead walked over to his bed and stopped on the right side. Shinji was scared, she had the look of ill intent in her eyes. He had to address her before she did something crazy.

"Do I know yo-"

"You're so pathetic."

"Excuse me?"

"I find you disgusting! You think you can just leave me to die? Little Invincible Shinji is too good to save one goddamn person from death!? I'll never forgive you!" She grabbed his new cup of water from the table the nurse had provided and slammed it at the nearest wall.

"Please, I don't know what you're talking about!"

"If I ever get my hand on you again Ikari, you better look nice. Everyone should look nice when they see god!"

A figure ran inside the door and scanned the area. It was Doctor Akagi.

"Shinji! Are you okay? What happened?" Shinji was stunned. She was gone. The girl standing off to his side was just gone in an instant. No trace of her was there.

"Th-there was this girl. She came into my room, locked the door, and started yelling at me."

"That can't be true. The door was unlocked the whole time. The nurse and me down the hallway didn't see a girl enter either. Are you sure?"

"She threw glass near the wall and yelled, what do you mean you saw nobody!?"

"Shinji calm down, just let me and the nurse handle the situation." Ritsuko walked over to the wall and bent over. She examined a shard of glass in her hands.

"See! I'm not crazy!"

"Hmm…Nurse, leave me to talk to Shinji. Alone."

Yes, ma'am." The nurse at the door left the room. Leaving Ritsuko and Shinji alone.

"Shinji, I was waiting to hold off on telling you this, but it might be too important to leave out. When you defended the city, you used the man made weapon called an Evangelion. Even if it's the pinnacle of human knowledge, it changed you more than you know. The battle was successful for a time being, you started to beat the angel on your own accord, then the Eva stopped moving. The Angel beat you an to an inch of your life. And then something we weren't prepared for happened. The Eva went berserk while you were unconscious from the battle. Of course you won, but…" Shinji was on the edge of his seat. This had all happened to him, but he had no memory of it. God, amnesia made you feel like you didn't belong anywhere. It made you feel lost. If he knew anything, maybe it would help him find what he was missing. He had to know.

"But what Akagi, I need to know! Did somebody die?"

"Sigh"

"The Eva tried to absorb you, but your Synch Ratio was too low for it to fully absorb you. The process actually made you absorb a part of the Eva. We're still not sure what effects this can have on you yet. It's also another reason we're keeping you in Nerv custody."

"Is, is there anything wrong with me?"

"No, but there are slight differences in your genetic makeup." Ritsuko checked her pocket and brought out a small medical mirror. She held it up in front of Shinji's face. His face. Oh god. His eyes! His eyes had the shade of demonic red in them. As if he was being possessed by a demon itself. What had happened in that Evangelion?

* * *

A lone woman typed away on a computer in her dimly lit office. She had decided to take her work to Nerv after Misato escorted Shinji out of the hospital. It was the middle of night, everyone had left for home already. She had finally got a chance to smoke a cigarette since the hospital didn't allow smoking. The pitter patter of keys were the only sound bouncing in the room. The sound of a footstep disturbed her out of work. Before she knew it, the sound of a gun's resistance was heard.

"How'd it go?" A man's voice spoke out of the darkness from behind the Doctor's chair. This didn't surprise Ritsuko, she knew the man be visiting her sometime, and if he decided to kill her...well, she decided that she would allow this man to do just that.

"Besides what we gathered after his battle, he seems to have lost his memory." The man smiled in triumph for the silent victory in his head.

"Good, I accounted for that. How has the spread of the news been around Nerv?"

"Everyone is accounted for, I made sure every knew that expelling the secret would result in imprisonment and quite possible death in certain cases. After that, nobody argued." Most of the man's small time plans were coming together. Even if the plan was hatched a little late, it would give him the winning hand in this war. He had gotten most of what he needed from the woman, just a bit more and he could finish up here.

"How is Fuyutsuki handling operations now?"

"He is operating everything like you never left." Ritsuko returned to finishing paper work while answering questions. The man in the shadows returned the gun to his holster, and proceeded to leave.

"Before you go, I want to know what should we expect in the future?"

"I'm currently in a shadow agreeance with Nerv and officers of Seele. As long as someone keeps the lackies in line, my secret will be kept." The man left the conversation hanging. He reached for the doorknob one final time.

"Was this really the best course of action? What about your son? What if he remembers you?" The woman knew this question was out of term with him, but curiosity got the better of her.

"So be it if he knows about me, as long as he's in the dark too, nothing can go wrong."

"I mean, who will be able to guide him. He believes both his parents are passed now..." This conversation was getting on the man's nerves, he came to get information, not curiousity. He regained his composure and steadied on.

"This will be better for Shinji, he won't have to go through the pain of having me around." With that final remark, Gendo Ikari opened the door and left Ritsuko's office. The door shut quietly behind him.

"Sounds like the words of a coward to me. Too afraid to face his own son." After the man had left the doctor made sure that all her paperwork was finished, collected, and sealed before she left. She grabbed her purse, switched off the lights, and let darkness fall over the compound. A burning cigarette about to burn out casted a glow near paperwork on the desk. The top of the stack read "Nerv Death Count-3rd Angel: Sakura Suzuhara" The beginning of Schrodinger's thought experiment was happening in real time.

* * *

Next time on Rebirthed Final; Shinji meets an old friend and remembers his purpose in life. This Rei Ayanami holds a dark past full of secrets. A main character knows what it is to die, and so much more. As promised, more fanservice!

* * *

Well hello, Author here. I just like to say thank you so muchhhhhh. This is again my first actual fanfiction, so take it with a grain of salt. It took me about a week and a half to write all of this, mostly cause I'm a lazy bastard. I'm going to put the setting on T for now, but will probably update it later to an M. Plot demands, am I right? So anyways, leave any type of review you can. I love attention btw.


	2. Death Is A Cruel Reminder

Hello. I like to have a talk to explain myself _and I'd like to take a minute. Just sit right there. I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel-Air._ Lol got ya. Anywho, this is the second chapter of my story. Rei is going to be out of character, but it's all part of the plot and backstory of this "Rei". So for all the die hard Ayanami fans out there, I'm kinda sorry. I was considering making some OC characters for this, even giving them small backstories, but I finally decided against it. I'll explain more stuff after this chapter, so buckle up kiddos.

Death is a Cruel Reminder

To explain Shinji Ikari's life right now would probably be hard to do. Not even Shinji had come up with an answer to all the strange things happening to him. He, somehow in little less than a week, had defended humanity from Gods themselves using some type of weapon, be changed by the weapon when it tried to "consume" him, and get adopted by the Captain that commanded such weapons. It somehow all revolved around the weapon he used. He finally broke his thoughts to ask his new guardian a question. Be safe though, as he could see so far this Katsuragi lady was a terrible driver. Even after of leaving the hospital for five minutes, he wanted to go back more than ever. It was night, but Shinji was sure the Nerv hospital stayed open all hours of the night. Her driving made his stomach queasy and uneasy. The first car ride home was not enjoyable at all. She let her guard down on the car ride, so it was a great time as any to pop the question.

"Katsuragi, what are the weapons called Evas?" Shinji asked. Misato jumped out of her seat, swerved on the road, and about smashed into an oncoming streetlight after the question. She readjusted her hands on the steering wheel to get the car under control. After the mild slipup, Misato turned her head to look at Shinji. She was pissed off.

"Holy hell kid, almost forgot that you're in here!" She held the face of a demon directed at Shinji. He tried his best to dodge her scornful look, but she was making sure that eye contact was established. Neither the Captain or the Pilot spoke, just leaving an awkward emptiness between them. Shinji couldn't bare it, he needed to do something to change the way this was heading.

"Shouldn't you be watching the road?"

"Fine. But you're lucky that a heart attack didn't claimed my life just now. Don't sneak up on people like that." She finally turned her head back to road and continued driving "safe".

'Wow, I was right. Such a child.' Shinji silently judged the Captain. The Captain saw Shinji looking at her on the edges of his eyes, he was just trying to act tentative so she wouldn't notice him. Misato already knew she was making a bad impression on the kid, but she couldn't let her reputation be smashed by such a question. Now, how to explain a Bio Engineered Cyborg to a fourteen year old kid was the real problem.

"Um, well Evas are kinda, in a sense, giant robots." Anyone listening to the conversation would have just dignified the Captain as crazy, but this world held many possibilities. Shinji thought she could be somewhat trusted. She did take him into her care after all, so she wasn't totally bad. Her answer did give Shinji another doubt in his mind.

"So if I used a robot to kill an Angel. What are the Angels like?" Shinji's curiousness held the quality of know no bounds, if he was going to save humanity, he wanted all the answers too. Misato's face went grim at this question, she gripped the steering wheel until her knuckles turned white. Did Shinji strike a nerve with the Captain? Everyone in this place had something wrong with them, Shinji could see it spell out on the faces of people here. 'What a wonderful place to end up at…' He thought.

"Shinji, if you don't mind, I like to get home before you start interrogating me." At her request Shinji just patiently stayed silent in the car. Great, another person in his life he played a wrong note with. First the doctor, then the redhead, and now Katsuragi. How many more was he going to place there?

"But you know, if we're going to interrogate, I usually like it a little rough." She quickly brought one hand up from the steering wheel and flashed a peace sign in the front of her eye while sticking out her tongue. Shinji couldn't help but be astonished at the sight. How could he handle a woman who jumped from one side of the emotional spectrum, to the whole other side. He just let the comment go and sighed in his seat. The Captain tried her best to turn the situation around, but the boy wasn't having it. He just wanted to relax for once, this car seat wasn't _that_ bad, a little stiff, but workable. The boy snuggled into the seat to find a nice spot.

"You know, all that stress is gonna kill you. Just stay smiling and things can turn up for the better." Misato didn't know how to be a parent yet, hell she barely took care of herself, but she knew how to make the best come out of people. Shinji didn't say anything to Misato.

"Hey, don't ignore me." She tried to get his attention with a whisper, but the boy was drifting off to sleep in her passenger seat.

'Heh, sweet dreams kid.'

She turned her head back to road and made sure to be as gentle as possible, this was her new roommate after all. The car sped along the highway to her apartment. A silent Captain and a sleeping boy were the passengers drifting among the winds.

* * *

Across the town, amid the sea of stars and light, stood a girl. Strange? Most residents were either in bed right now, or doing something work related. But this girl had a job to do, something she promised herself she do before the night was over. She was at the edge of town visiting the newest graves. The church there was long since abandoned before Second Impact, but the townspeople still used the land for graves of the dearly departed. Surrounding her was a stretch of gravemarkers as far as the eye could see. She was crouched over a newly made tombstone. It was different from the black pole markers. This one grave had extra effort put into it. The piece of work resembled the shape of a cross, the color of stone, and half the height of the other markers. Upon the girl lighting a match from her pocket, the words were eligible on the tombstone.

"Gendo Ikari. 1967 - 2003 Beloved father and husband."

"What a bunch of bullshit. Scum like you deserve more than death." She lifted the container she brought with her and emptied the liquid contents all over the stone, making it glisten and shine with the brief light from stars. She rummaged around her pocket looking for the matches she also happen to bring. She finally found it in her other pocket. She started a match up, gazing into its orange flame. She thought the flame would provide her some answers, maybe tell her to stop and go back home. All it did was wisp in the wind. Dissatisfied, she threw it on top of the irregular tombstone. Nothing happened for a second, but then a great, low, orange flame consumed the tombstone. One of the girl's worries burned away in front of her. The fire illuminated the night, making the school girl's clothes glow brilliantly. A speck of ash floated with the breeze and touched the girl's silky, blue, cropped hair. She fluffed her hair to get all the dust out. Tonight had been a long night indeed. She went to grab the container when suddenly she felt the presence of the Third Child moving. She felt everyone in turn, a connection so to speak. She was connected to everyone on this planet. Yet she took a special liking to this one boy, nothing made him any different in the beginning, he was just like everyone else on this planet. But when he fought the Angel the other day, she felt it. Oh god what a rush his aura sent her. She couldn't describe him in sentences alone, it was as if something had awakened inside him when he fought the angel. He wasn't like her, no not at all, but he still had something no other person had on this planet right now. It was if his soul was ablaze. She craved it. She knew what was going to happen tonight. She was going to visit Shinji Ikari, and learned what made him so unusual. They must have moved him from the hospital, and were taking him to a new location, she assumed. She finished watching the fire char the stone's surface, picked up the container, and made a mad dash towards the new home of Shinji Ikari. She was not going to let him escape her grasp again.

* * *

Shinji felt a prodding finger in her right shoulder, but he tried to ignore it and get more sleep. Sleeping was the only thing on his mind, he moved his shoulder a bit so the nuisance go away. The finger didn't give up though, so he finally opened his eyes. Only to see cleavage right in front of his face. Shinji blushed at the sight. He stammered out an apology and moved his head elsewhere. The owner just giggled and slowly lifted Shinji into her arms. She moved him out of the car and laid him on his feet. Shinji brushed his drowsiness away, and turned an eye to the Captain's Apartment complex.

"Well Shinji, I know it isn't much, but this is my home. You're welcome to anything inside the house. Anything you like." Shinji could feel the snide comment in the air, but he decided it was best to leave it alone. Misato handed him a bag of his belongings that he somehow owned, and started heading towards the ground elevator. Misato saw that the boy hadn't even considered that Misato had things to grab too. How rude? This boy needed someone to teach him the right way. She hurried along, closing the doors, locking itm and rushed into the elevator before it closed.

"Top floor please, my good sir." She added at Shinji with a sly grin. She could really get used to having someone helping her every once in awhile. Shinji pressed the button without a comment and stayed that way. 'My my, what a cold fish he is. I wonder how he was able to make it this far?' Misato knew the boy was standoffish, but this was a bit ridiculous. The ride up was solemn, but she knew Shinji was tired, so she left him alone. The doors of the elevator glided open and Shinji was the first one out. Misato had to keep a good pace with the boy so he know where to go.

"Just head straight down and look for the Katsuragi residents!" The woman shouted down the row of doors, not caring for other people currently. Misato was having a tough time juggling all her possessions, so she let Shinji dive head first into the apartment. Shinji checked for the Katsuragi door down at the corner and found it. The door slide open to reveal a clustered house that had trash bags littered in some corners. Shinji stopped at the doorway, pausing for so long that Misato finally caught up with him. Curious, why didn't he just go in and make a room for himself?

"Shinji?"

"Yes?"

"Why don't you head inside? Is it too messy?"

"N-no! It's just that, well, this is too kind of you. I really can't believe it…"

"Shinji, it's fine. Just go inside, no thanks needed." The boy didn't move. He was just weeping on Misato's doorstep. He tried to keep it pent up, but it all just came tumbling down. He felt like nobody had given him anything in the world, but right here, right in front of Shinji, a woman had sacrificed so much for him. He could never repay the was too much for him. He cried silent tears so that Misato wouldn't notice. His best attempt wasn't good enough for Misato, she saw right through him. She put all her items on the ground and pulled Shinji into a hug. Sure, it was kinda awkward at first, with the boy a bit stiff here and there. But he melted right into her arms after that discomfort.

"Shinji, I know you feel lost right now, but I'm here for you. Don't be sad." She embraced him even more, just to make sure he felt needed. It also made Misato feel needed, not in a relationship where she was trapped by another person, but in one where she was the support beam. She liked this feeling, but she felt a tinge of guilt when she realized his efforts were also making her feel better. She broke the hug and pulled Shinji away.

"It's been a long night, and rest is good for the soul. I'll help you make your bed tonight, but only tonight. I don't want to go off and start spoiling you, now do I?"

She grabbed her packages off the ground and ushered the boy inside the apartment. It had been a long night indeed.

* * *

This was the place, Rei made sure. She checked for the unusual pulse the Third Child produced. Yep! On the top floor came a faint strange feeling that made her skin crawl. Now more than ever she wanted to talk to boy, but she had enemies in the way. Section 2 agents were scattered all over the place. some staked out the roof of the building, but most of them took shifts guarding the parking lot. This was going to be hard. Never in her life had she seen so many collections of agents. The prize inside the apartment was totally worth the risk to Rei, but she needed a plan if extraction was possible. She remained still in the alleyway across from the apartments. It took the better half of ten minutes to come up with the plan, but she knew it was simple enough to work. She trashed around the alleyway looking for a bottle and cloth. A dumpster down the ways provided all the materials needed. She poured the rest of the fuel in the bottle from the container she brought along and shoved the rag down the snout to clog it. She made sure to leave the container in the trash, didn't want to be risky and leave evidence behind. Surely the trash collector would pick up the dumpster soon.

Okay, she had everything made, now she just had to find the fire escape on the building. This was a somewhat old building, not as old as her place, but still old enough to have fire escapes. She had to circle the block, making sure to dodge the sight of agents along the way, but she finally found it. At the side facing the opposite street was a skinny fire escape. Perfect too, none of the people on the roof or lot could see it either. She ran across the street and casually made her way to the back of the building. The hard part was over, now she just had to grab the boy and go. She sticked to the shadows with the building facing her left, her palm slid the surface so she knew where to head. Behind her she heard a rustle.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" '

'Shit! If I don't do something soon, this whole operation will be a bust!' She spun around to have a beam of light greet her face. A middle aged man in a suit walked up to the girl. She made sure to keep her hands around her back so as to hide the bottle.

"I'm sorry mister. I snuck out with my friends tonight and I'm coming back home." Rei tried for her best innocent voice that she could muster. It wasn't like the first time she had to use it or anything.

"Well little girl, let me get you some help. It's not like I'm an evil guy or anything..." The man reached into his pocket and brought out a walkie-talkie. He pressed the button down and was about to speak. 'No, if he calls for backup, one of them might recognize me. Gotta use another excuse and quick!'

"No wait!" Rei screamed at the man. He released his finger off the button and sent an eyebrow upwards, as to get an answer from the girl.

"If you call anyone to take me home, my mom might scold me when she answers the door to see men in suits. She actually lives in this apartment complex. I was going to use the fire escape and sneak back into my house…" God, if this didn't work for Rei, nothing else could. She already plunged herself too deep to escape now. She just had act the best and make sure it all went smoothly. The man put away his walkie-talkie and started moving at Rei. 'If worse comes to worse, maybe I can fight him. No, that's stupid. He is clearly larger than me, all I be to him is a pesky kid. Can't jump the gun too soon, I have to see what he does…'

The man stopped an arm's length away from Rei. It was too late to turn back, if she ran, the agent would probably grab her and bring her in for questioning. He raised his arm lazily from his side at Rei. 'It's all over. I should have ran when I had the chance…' She dredded. The man slowly continued to lift his arm until it was well above Rei's head. He brought it down and started petting her hair. He spoke, not to Rei in a sort of sense, but more to himself.

"You remind me of when I was a kid...Ah, I miss those days of before." His eyes had an absent look in them. They looked at Rei, but she knew he was glancing at his past through her. She stepped back and let the man's arm fall back to his side. He noticed and apologized.

"Sorry for that little one, get back to your mother before she worries about you. I'll just tell the fellows up front that I went to the bathroom back here." The man clearly took a liking to Rei. Yes. Luckily this man had fallen for her lies. Rei inhaled to calm her nerves.

"Thank you mister!" She replied. She watched as the man left the area and went back to the front with her eyes. If the plan was going to work, she needed to do it soon, it was already a little past midnight. In the frightened state she was in, Rei neglected to feel that her right hand slipped in her pocket and was now holding her pocket knife. She let go of the knife. Did that man really scare her that much? She knew if she stabbed the man from before, he would call for backup immediately. Rei knew the punishment for murder attempt, even if she was a pilot, the court system still abided to laws here. The fire door was right around the corner of the building. Rei ran up to the door and pulled it open. She made it to the top floor in a couple of minutes. A set of stairs was nothing compared to Pilot training at Nerv. She made off on the top floor and started searching for the boy's soul. She navigated some turns before she made a stop in front of the first corner apartment after people got off the elevator. The house label was "Katsuragi". Wait _the Katsuragi_? The new lady at Nerv who commanded the Eva Pilots? Huh, maybe they were keeping him here until further notice. Couldn't blame the Nerv department, it was sometimes how they rolled. Rei made sure to check the floor one final time before putting the distraction in plan. She surveyed the streets, if she threw this in the wrong place. There be no telling of what could happen. The street on the outside of the apartment looked like the best bet. It was divided by the apartment's wall to keep people out, and it only had one car parked near the curb. The car was pretty close, so Rei thought that she could out distance it with her throw. Nice, it would take the agents a few minutes to check out a disturbance if anything happened. They flock to the place like moths to a flame. She set the bottle on the ground and sparked a match from her pocket. The dry, old rag caught fire. She never really made one of these before, but she thought it be a pretty nice distraction. Rei thought to herself. 'What did they call these things again?'

She chucked the bottle at the street.

'Oh yeah, Molotov cocktails.' The little bottle shrinked out of the distance, getting closer and closer to the ground. Its arc was actually not that bad, Rei gave herself a little gratitude, that is, until something went wrong. The bottle was falling way too fast. _And getting dangerously close to something bad._ The bottle smashed through the windshield of the car on the street and set the interior to flames. All the men in the parking lot heard the noise and saw the flames from where they were at. The pulled out their guns and ran to the car on the other side of the wall.

She just stood there in shock from her carelessness.

"Well….shit."

"Guess it's their problem now." She had to talk to the Third Child soon. If she didn't, she might not get the chance to talk to him ever again. She proceeded to pick the lock to the Katsuragi apartment and walked in.

* * *

Dance For Me, My Puppet of Fate - Part 1

It was quiet inside, the hum of kitchen appliances was the only sound heard. A hallway connected to a living room on the left and a kitchen up ahead. She made sure to shut the door quietly, as to not wake anyone up. The entire flat was covered in a hot presence. It felt like a fire inside to Rei, but to anyone else normal it would have felt normal. She saw a light from the refrigerator inside the open kitchen and started to make way for her first impression. She made sure to tiptoed her way to the kitchen. It wasn't far off, so she reached it within a few steps. Inside was a strange sight, something even the girl couldn't believe...A penguin was rummaging through the fridge. After a moment of searching, the animal pulled out what looked like to be a beer.

"The hell?" She whispered. She hid behind the frame of the door to conceal herself and think.

'Pull yourself together Rei, this must be a part of the aura. A trap most like…' She closed her eyes to make sure that the penguin went away. When she opened them, a small bird was looking gayly and strangely at her from below her skirt. Both occupants just stared at each other shortly before the bird snapped at her ankle softly.

"O-ouch, what was that for you alcoholic?!" She quipped at the bird. The bird studied her until it raised its arms up, beer in flipper grasp.

"You want me to hold you?" She asked. The bird shook its head up and down.

"Okay, but tell me where the Third Child is first." The bird gave a look of annoyance, but turned around and started walking to the hall.

'I must be crazy to take directions from a bird. Almost as bad as that German girl I've heard about.'

They walked back into the hallway and the bird stopped at the end of the hall. Directly In front of the animal was the final door in the hall. She caught up to the door and and bent over to the bird. She handled his collar for a second.

"Pen to the second power?" She looked at the bird, raising an quizitive eyebrow.

"Is it Pen Pen?" She asked. The bird put its head up and down. She ruffled his feathers and petted his head.

"Sorry, Pen Pen, I lied about picking you up. I'll make it up to you next time. I promise." The bird shared his expression of defeat and started to waddle off. Cracking open the beer and taking gulps out while doing so. She returned to the door frame and took a second to calm her nerves. 'Big breath Rei, nothing to be afraid of.'

She flexed her hand a little, but she finally did it. The girl pulled open the door and peered inside. It was lightless and silent. She scanned to find a body or anything in the room. A few feet away from her, tossing and turning could be heard. Red glowing eyes pierced her soul from the ground. Frightened, she tripped backwards on her own feet and landed on her rear, striking her head in the process.

"Oww..." She let out a soft whimper as she held her head on the floor. Whatever was on the ground moved above Rei and casted personal penance on her.

"Who are you?" The voice asked. To Rei, it sounded like a teenager's voice. So she quelled her fear and swallowed the bitter taste.

"Rei Ayanami, Pilot of prototype Eva 0." Her trained tongue slipped and she revealed her Nerv personnel. The figure moved over to a chair and sat down.

'Oh great, got a real gentleman here…' She picked herself off the ground and patted her skirt off.

"Why are you here?" The boy asked.

"Why else? To see you." She tried to stare at the boy, but he avoided eye contact with the girl.

"You kno-" She started to speak, but an explosion from outside disrupted the conversion. The boy quickly ducked his head at the sound. This surprised Rei, a pair of blood red eyes belong to a scared little boy. As intimidating as he was, that was just a fake front put up by his appearance.

Wait. Something was wrong. Something that made Rei more scared than what this boy had done to her. Outside, a huge group of men were moving up the stairs to the elevator. Rei could feel their bloodlust up from here. If she didn't leave soon, they would catch her in a couple of minutes. She be put in Nerv confinement, but not before they had their way with her. She knew the agents to be cruel sometimes, but she knew they were not the friendliest of men. Maybe they would punish her, maybe even hurt her. She had no choice, but she didn't even get to talk to the Third Child. In a hasty decision, she decided to do something a little risky.

"Third Child, come with me. Men are coming to this apartment right away, most likely to take me to someplace bad." She extended her hand to the boy in the dark. He just sat, mouth gaping at her sudden request. He jerked his head around, to see if this was a really safe choice or not. After looking at her hand for a moment, he grabbed it.

"Okay, let's go." She pulled the boy out the chair to the door and was about to exit. Rei paused and turned to look at the boy.

"We should put something on to hide our faces. You have anything?" She asked him. The boy nodded, let go of her hand, and started shuffling around the room looking for something in his bag of items. He produced a matching pair of a light leather black jacket and a cotton black beanie. Both had small red labels on the back. He shrugged when he couldn't find any other worthy items. She pointed to the beanie and he handed it to her. She put as much of her blue hair under the beanie as possible. He slipped into the jacket and gave her a nod of approval. His eyes and body were sending waves of fear towards Rei, his body had a tiny quiver while he darted his eyes to every corner of the room. She beckoned him to leave the room and follow her. He did as told and went with her to the front of the house, past drunken Pen-Pen and Misato's door. She quit walking right before she grabbed the handle to outside. The men were already halfway up to the top of the apartment and began loading their weapons in the elevator. Rei turned directly around and matched eyes with the boy.

"On the count of three, we're going to run straight to the fire exit. Take a right down the hall. If you beat me there, maybe you'll get a medal, so run really fast." Rei went for the handle and opened the door. She held the Third Child's hand in hers to direct him. She stretched her legs out out started her pace off. Down the hall, the elevator opened with a ding and several men in dark suits got off. The ringleader in front yelled down the corridor at the teens.

"Stop in the name of Nerv or be fired upon trespassers!" The men pulled their guns from the hollisters and turned off the safety. Shinji whispered into Rei's ear.

"How are we going to get past them?" His words were weak, but he held hope in them.

"Just run and I'll cover us. Be ready for it now." Was her reply.

"One…." Shinji's & Rei's muscles began to tense up.

"Two…." Silence sweeped the floor.

"Three." The Nerv agents began pulling the triggers.

Shinji and Rei broke into a sprint down the right. Bullets began wissing past their heads. Shatters of glass and debris from concrete walls littered their bodies as they ran. Ringing was the only sound. The sound of the guns made everyone's ears ring from the shots. Shinji's felt his feet were slamming the floor from how hard he was running down the hall. Rei casted an invisible barrier to the left, protecting them. If they didn't make it to the exit soon, Rei would have to put her shield down for the fear of being detected as an angel. Rei and Shinji were halfway to the exit when one of the men started firing a machine gun from the elevator. The men forced Rei to withhold her barrier from how many bullets they were firing. She tackled Shinji to the ground and placed him behind the wall with her. While the hallway's walls were small, it did give the teens breathing room. Bullets rained around them. Glass, metal, and stone was devastated near them. Windows and chunks of rock flew at them from the impacts. They held their heads close to their chests for fear of being shot. Shinji was softly crying in his arms. 'What did I do to deserve this? Why can't I get a break? I. Am Sick. Of. This.' Shinji thought. He knew that certain death was coming fast and painless to him in this apartment complex.

"Scum like you deserve this." The voice came out of nowhere. It didn't belong to the girl next to him, she was breathing rapidly to calm down. He had heard this voice before though, but not as calm from when he heard it once before. He raised his head to see the redhead crouched in front of him. She still had the same skin tight suit, but something was different about her. Hunger and desire were in her eyes. Shinji was aghast to see this girl look so...so...victorious. Like she had just won a battle because of his inevitable death.

"Don't look so sad Shinji, I'll hold your hand while you're in Death's embrace." She spoke to him like there was no other way out of this. It was a whisper that spoke directly to Shinji's soul. Whoever this was, wanted him to die without mercy. He wasn't even worthy of a peaceful death to this girl. He should have left the blue hair girl to defend herself, but he knew that deep down, he couldn't bare to let a stranger die. Even if he was standoffish, he still cared for others. He had the soul and mind of a person who was in pain, but he knew that was no excuse to let others die. He just had no strength to help anyone, nonetheless himself.

"Shinji! Shinji!" Rei was screaming his name. He was brought back to reality where bullets were populating the walls currently. Rei was yelling at him over the sounds of gunfire.

"They are about to reload! As soon as they stop, finish the last run! I don't know if I can protect us anymore!" Shinji was numb to her words. He just nodded to make sure she knew he heard. Shinji turned his head to find the girl, but she was gone. Goddamn it, who was the girl that was terrorizing him? He just wanted her to leave him alone.

"Come on Third Child!" Rei grabbed Shinji's hand and yanked him up, pulling him to his feet. Shinji noticed that the air was full of men's grunts and that gunfire had begun to stop. They were feet away from the stairs exit when Shinji heard the gunshots resume. They came from closer now. The men were making advances on the children as they tried to make their escape. Rei made it to the stairs first and began to open the door. She stopped for a brief second to look at Shinji. He had to hurry or the men would catch both him and this girl.

Come on or they'll ge-" Her words were cut short when a bullet aimed for Shinji's back missed and hit Rei in the stomach. She tried her best to hold on, but the impact threw her off balance and she fell backwards. A small pool of blood began draining from her and left marks all over the steps. She tumbled down the stairs a few steps before she came to stop at the bottom. She laid there immobile and weak.

Shinji froze at the sight, this girl that just wanted to talk to him was now lying on the ground. Dying from a gunshot wound. What had happened? How did Shinji get tangled up in a mess of death? Shinji couldn't take it. Nobody, not even this girl, should die at such a young age. He knew what he had to do, but he didn't know if he had the courage to do it.

He was going to turn himself in. Maybe if he did this, he could say he was just using the girl as a hostage. He slowly raised his hands to his head and turned in a circle. Before he could finish doing so, something small bumped him in the head. He reached behind and in his palm was a small silver bullet from a gun one of the men were firing at the pair. By the time he finally turned around, a bizarre sight greeted him. Dozen of bullets were lofting in the air, enough to make a wall with gaps everywhere. On the other side, the agents were frozen from a couple doors down. They stood still, fear coursing through their veins. Never in their life had they seen this.

Shinji was hesitant on what to do, but he knew he could use this to his advantage. He took a steady breath to sound confident.

"I-if you want to leave here a-alive, t-then I suggest you leave now. For your sake." The men looked at their comrades before putting their weapons away. Shinji had other plans.

"L-leave the guns on the floor. I'm worried about me and the girl's safety." They dropped all their guns cautiously on the ground and started to go back the way they came. It would be a minute or two getting back to the elevator. They had to dodge several pieces of destroyed building on the walk back. Once Shinji knew they were in the elevator, he stopped putting effort into holding the bullets up. Whatever he had been using just now took considerable mental power and strength out of the boy. He collected 4 guns from the ground and headed back to the direction of the girl. He wasn't gonna let her die on his watch. He stashed the weapons in his hoodie while he opened the doorway to the exit. What was before him threw him for a curve ball. The girl was sitting at the bottom of the step, clearly waiting for him to finish what he was doing earlier.

"Hey." She spoke offhandedly at him. He just stood dumbfounded at the top of the stairs.

"B-but, I saw the bullet hit you in the stomach. You feel back and started bleeding. What happened to you?" The girl sighed and approached him at the top of the stairs. She stood awkwardly close to the boy, enough to make himself feel self-conscious. She grabbed the edge of her uniform and brought it up. Underneath was a large gash with makeshift bandages around it. She traced her fingers along the wound. She winced when she got too close to the edge of torn skin.

"I stopped the bullet before it could do any real damage. Lucky me I guess…" Shinji knew she wasn't well. Her face was white as clouds and she was shaking slightly.

"Hey, how did you get those guys away? When I came to, all of them were gone." She asked. Shinji didn't know what to say, because he really had no clue what he did back there.

"They, um, saw they killed you and r-ran away." His excuse was lame, and he stuttered through it, but he hoped the girl would believe it enough. She backed her hand away from the bandages and extended her hands towards Shinji. She left it hanging in the air between them. He just stared at it until she spoke.

"This is called a handshake, it means you shake hands and greet each other." Her sarcasm was blistering hot, but she tried to control it. The boy finally put his hand out to hers and held a loose grasp.

"Rei Ayanami, my nights aren't usually crazy like this. You?"

"Shinji Ikari." He replied. The pair held an awkward silence after the greet. Rei's grip was barely holding on now, something was wrong with her.

Rei let go of his hand, and put her head down. She was shaking violently now. Shinji put his hand on her shoulder but she slapped it away before it touched her. She returned her head to look at Shinji. She was angry. Rei lifted her arm from her side, formed a fist, and lunged at him. She landed a punch to his face, making him fall back and land in the doorway of the stairs. Blood spilled from Rei's open wound, splashing fresh red on the grey concrete below her. She grunted in pain and held her gut. After recovering, he tried to feel where she punched him, but it stung every time his finger graced the area. Rei was still standing where she was, her breathing was ragged and shallow.

"What was that for!?" He demanded. Rei just stopped looking at him altogether. She was beginning to leave down the stairs when she spoke to him. Her back was facing him.

"I don't want to have anything to do with the Ikari family. They've only brought me pain. Goodbye Shinji, I'm never going to talk to you again. I swear on my life." With that out of her, she proceeded to leave Shinji there alone. Shinji just waited till she was gone. Nothing good ever came of meeting new people. Shinji knew this good and well now, he was determined to avoid people at all cost. They only brought pain and trouble to his life, he be better off not dealing with them. As he watched Rei go, she unexpectedly collapsed down the stairs, falling all the way to the bottom of the flight. Shinji rushed from sitting and bolted down the stairs. He saw that Rei was limp on the floor. He stopped beside her body at the bottom of the stairs.

"Rei?" Shinji tried to wake her up by moving her shoulder. She was unresponsive.

"Please comeback Rei, you can't die like this! I can't have you die angry at me..." He tried to shake her shoulder more, but in the end it was futile. Rei laid on the floor, slowly bleeding out to her death. A boy hovered over her body softly weeping for his friend.

* * *

Commendation and farewell. The priest spoke these words: "Let us commend Sakura Suzuhara to the mercy of God."  
"We therefore commit her body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in the sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to eternal life." The priest's sharp words pierced several people at the funeral. It was early morning in Tokyo 3, the sun had just raised above the horizon. It sent faded rays of sun into the park the funeral was being held at. The birds chirped pleasantly at another. Below the Sakura Trees, cherry blossoms covered the child's coffin beautifully. A father held hands with his young boy while his father's father sat in a chair near the coffin. The grandfather patted the smooth wood, getting a feel for how this felt one last time. The park they inhabited was soothing and calm. Only the three were there, other members of the family were either dead or lived far away. Sakura was now on this long list of passed people in the Suzuhara family. Daughter and Mother were now dancing together in the clouds, having their very own ballet. The teen with several bruises on his face spoke to his father.

"Dad, this feels real wrong. Sakura was younger than me. She had so much 'head of her." The father craned his neck to look at his son, he put his knee on the ground to get to eye level with him.

"Son, I know this is going to sound harsh, but it's just a part of life. I miss your sister too, but we'll just have to cherish her memories in our hearts." He pulled his son's head into the crook of his neck and shoulder. The boy started sobbing uncontrollably and used his father's shirt as a cloth. They stayed like that until the boy brought himself back up.

"Are you okay?" The father asked.

"Yeah, crying is for the weak. He stated.

"On the contrary son, those who cry on the outside are the bravest people you'll meet. They are not afraid to share their emotions. I'm going to check on grandpa. Be right back" The dad got back on two feet and left his son to go over to the casket. He shared a feel of the coffin along with the old man.

"Are you ready to continue?" The priest addressed both men. They both nodded and looked over to Toji who had been watching the whole time. He headed towards them to finish Sakura's funeral.

"Let the past be forgiven, and may her sins be taken away. For in death, you shall be born anew. I would like to now hold a prayer for Sakura." The four men at the site put their hands together and silently prayed for the girl. The priest began from where he left off.

"Everything that has a beginning has an ending. Make your peace with that and all will be well." He started to lower the girl's body into the grave with a pulley system. Toji's father helped the man to make it go faster. When they hit the bottom of the grave, the pair began shoveling dirt back into it. The boy watched quietly while they buried his dead sister. Within a quarter of an hour, the two men almost finished the job. With the last heave from his father, the grave and burial of Sakura Suzuhara was done. In the distance, the sound of emergency sirens started playing.

* * *

Shinji Ikari pushed open the door to what was Rei Ayanami's apartment. He was holding Rei in his arms. He was covered in her blood that dragged all the way from his abdomen to legs. He walked into her house and set her on the bed. He walked blocks carrying this girl. After the men left, Shinji tried to help the girl. The only thing on her was a Nerv ID, on the back was an address of where she lived. He then navigated past guards and made for the girls house. Except he would have taken her to a hospital if he knew this place was going to be so filthy. 'God, this place is a dump.'

He started raiding whatsoever cabinets the girl had in the apartment. She had a bag of pills on a metal drug cart beside some glasses. Upon inspection, he saw that they were prescribed by Dr. Akagi herself. He put a couple in a plastic beaker and went to what seemed to be the bathroom. He checked for several towels. Some were prepared on a rack, so he swiped those along with a bottle of peroxide in the medicine cabinet. He returned to Rei and started undressing her. He had a moment's panic when his brain caught up to his actions.

'Come on Shinji, if you don't help this girl, she's going to die!" With that thought in mind, he ripped her shirt off her body and removed her bloodied skirt. Her panties were matted with blood, but he would have to worry about that later. He just needed to dress the wound before she bled out. He dampened a towel with peroxide and began applying soft pressure to the wound. The girl produced a sharp hiss when he touched it. Good. He knew the girl was still with him, but not for long if he didn't finish this. He pulled the towel back to see the wound froth with bubbly puss. He threw the towel he used away and reached for another. He put the towel on it while he gathered the pills and a cup of water together at the nearby sink. He returned to see that the towel had absorbed huge amounts of her blood. He opened her mouth and inserted two pills as described on the bottle. He poured a bit of water in to make sure they went down smoothly. He coerced her throat so that she could swallow the pills. A loud gulp was enough satisfaction to Shinji's ears. With that done, he slumped besides her bed. Beams of sun broke through Rei's door, making the room shine. It must have taken Shinji a few hours to even make it this far carrying the girl. His arms were so weak now.

"I wonder what Misato is gonna do when she finds out I left?" He spoke to nobody but himself in the room. Only been out of the hospital for a few hours and he was already saving a girl's life. What a day he thought. He tried to get some rest, but it was uncomfortable on the floor. The boy moved over to the bed, but gave up when he didn't want to take any room from Ayanami. The boy was lost in a sea of concrete and confusion. He just went back to sitting beside Ayanami on the floor. That was when the sound of sirens jerked Shinji into an alert mode. He felt in his gut something bad was going to happen. But it was already too late for the boy to run now.

* * *

Hampshire, New England. 3rd Nerv Division Squad

"Asuka! Are you ready yet?" Kaji shouted at Asuka's bunks from down the hall.

"We need to leave in 10 minutes. A confirmation of the fourth angel was just sighted by JSSDF V-TOLs off the coast of Japan." Kaji walked into the room to find a red head trying to carry more boxes than she could handle.

"Here, let me help you with those." He lent a helping hand to Asuka, but she dropped a box behind her. Forcing Kaji to reach behind her back and grab the box before it smashed into the ground. This caused Kaji to be extremely close to Asuka. She had a faint blissful smile on her face.

"Ah, the old pull them in to help trick. Next time Asuka, just be ready and don't make any cheeky plans." He talked like he knew about the subjects, but his only job was to take care of Asuka. He didn't have time to play with her.

"But Kaji-san, I learned from the best." Her snide comment was a little unsettling, the girl was only fourteen, but she already had a mastery on several things. 'Any boy that comes close to her will have a tough time.' Kaji thought to himself.

"Asuka. I don't have time for games. We need to leave for the ship."

Wait, I thought we were going to leave in a few weeks, instead you made me pack up all my things last night. Going back on your word is a terrible trait."

"Yes, I know Asuka, but they told me after the battle with the 3rd Angel, the pilot lost all his memories and they will need as much firepower as they could get. So come on." He signaled with his hand that they needed to leave. She grabbed her essentials and followed him out into the hall, she talked while walking beside him.

"He must be a real wimp to lose that badly. Not like a real man would do, like you Kaji." Kaji just ignored her words and kept looking straight. This pissed Asuka off slightly, but she knew she couldn't lose her temper around Kaji. She tried her best to put a cheerful face at Kaji.

"I want to tell you one thing, we are not stopping by Japan first, he have to make for a detour to America." He stated.

"Wait, why America?" She questioned.

"Well, an unforeseeable accident happened at one of the bases. We are going to retrieve the only survivor." Asuka was shocked, an entire base was somehow in bad shape, and to top it off, only one person survived. She had to know more.

"Who survived?" Kaji cleared his throat.

"A pilot named Mari Makinami Illustrious."

"Hmm." Asuka had to ponder, she did hear that name before, but she couldn't exactly pinpoint it out. In the ports, next to the building Asuka was currently staying in, was the entire UN fleet. They had just finished loading her Eva mark two and were prepared for voyage to America. It would be sometime before Asuka would make her star appearance on the stage. But she was patient, fourteen years of her life she had worked for this, and she wasn't going to let it go. Kaji opened the front door of the building and let Asuka through. The sun was gentle on her skin while the breeze danced around her sundress. It was like a stagelight was pointed at her. She knew great things were in store.

End Chapter Two

* * *

Next time on Rebirthed Final / Hate Can Also Be Love. Shinji meets Shamshel. Rei is gravely wounded, but her best efforts might not be enough to pull through. Toji suffers another devastating loss. And Asuka is greeted by the elusive Mari Makinami Illustrious. Don't forget a side of fan service!

* * *

Well hell, that was a lot of work, anyways at the beginning I told you guys some stuff. So now let me reveal it. I am going to incorporate some of the Rebuilds into this story. Now wait before you slaughter me. I kinda have a hate/love relationship with the Rebuilds. So they are not going to influence the story too much, just enough to make plot shoot along. If this chapter is kinda poorly written, just tell me and I'll fix it some other time. Again thanks for reading and have a wonderful day/night!


	3. Paradise Paradox

Paradise Paradox

Too tired for an introduction. Just have fun and use the right protection.

 **Disclaimer:** See chapter 1.

* * *

Gendo kicked down the door to Rei's apartment with haste. Breaking the lock and handle at the same time, causing the contents to fly across the kitchen. He remained silent to as not let his presence be known more. Gendo had come when the Angel alert had been sounded, and slowly made his approach to Rei's apartment. He had been slowly following Shinji the whole time in the night, to make sure he didn't have ill intentions with Rei. The entryway was cluttered with dirt from recent shoe prints. The kitchen didn't look any better, shelves and cabinets were opened in a speedy pace, leaving them hanging open. He walked farther inside to see Rei half naked in her underwear on the bed, while Shinji was sitting asleep next to her mattress. Around the room, towels and medicine bottles were scattered on the ground. He nudged one of the towels on the floor and it trickled blood. Gendo moved over to Rei to check her status. A towel covered her abdomen. Blood pooled in the middle of the white cloth. He removed it to be greeted with nectar like substances coating the underside. Scraps of her white skin hung loose from the towel along with crusty, dried blood. He held a face of dismay. Clearly, to Gendo, Shinji wasn't the cause of this damage, but someone was. He would have to deal with the trouble later. Right now Rei was the only concern to him. He also have to leave before Shinji opened his eyes. Gendo didn't like to take chances, unless he could use them to his advantage. He would wait for his time to meet Shinji properly.

The Commander cleansed around what seemed to be a wound on her lower stomach, and wrapped her in a new towel. He loosely put his arms under her back, and gripped her sternly. She flinched at the grasp, but was too weak to really move away. Gendo lifted her off the bed and made way to the door. He had to leave soon, Nerv agents were on their way and about to storm the facility. He walked outside the door and down the steps to his personal car waiting by the street. As he reached the car, the driver door swung open and a middle aged man open the backseat door facing him. He set Rei down in the backseat and applied a blanket to her. Gendo and the man returned to the front of the car. Both the men entered and sat in a hushed atmosphere. The man removed a flat cap from his head. Wisps of grey hairs were revealed.

"And of Shinji?" The old man asked.

"He is fine, nothing the boy couldn't endure."

"But, will he not be frightened when he is met to Nerv forcing him into an unknown situation?"

"Fuyutsuki, worry only about what must be done. If Shinji is capable of living through this, then he will be able to live knowing his only parents are gone. The boy must find his own way." Gendo meant for the chatter and questions to stop. Fuyutsuki knew better than to pry about certain things. Mostly to leave the family matters by themselves. Fuyutsuki hummed in disapproval and turned the keys in the ignition. The car fired right up. He placed it in drive and began to head down the road. Meanwhile, off the coast of Japan, Shamshel took up a slow pace of floating towards Tokyo 3. Nothing short of a miracle would help a lone sleeping boy right about now.

* * *

"Hurry son, before they close the blast doors!" Toji's dad ushed in Toji with a hasty hand. The family and the pastor had moved into the nearest Angel Bunker, which also happened to be the same bunker the local school used. Toji was the last recipient to enter the doors. A group of helpers sealed the vault shut after Toji had barely slithered into the steel doors. Toji and his father followed the direction signs to locate habitable area. The group arrived at the shelter's lounge. A mass of school children could be seen near the back, while the adults mingled with everyone. Toji's father brushed his shoulder, grabbing his attention.

"Toji, I'll be right over with the other adults. Come to me if you need help. Okay?"

"Um, Sure thing dad.

"Hey look, isn't that your friend Kensuke? The man pointed over Toji's shoulder, causing him to direct his eyesight at a lone kid messing with a camcorder. The otaku boy raised his head at the mention of his name. He scanned the room until he spotted Toji with his father.

"Hey, go have some fun, huh." Toji's father talked into his ear and gave Toji a light shove towards his friend. Toji put in the effort to walk over to the boy and sit at his blanket.

"Hey Toji! What happened? Why weren't you at school?"

"I, um, had business." He awkwardly left the sentence alone. Kensuke felt something was wrong. Toji was usually either loud or not paying attention. He had to ask if everything was okay with him.

"Toji, did something happen? Something really bad?" Toji just sighed at the question. He only managed to look at the ground and not at Kensuke's eyes. He have to let Toji go if he didn't want to answer.

"Well, if it is still upsetting you later, just tell me. 'Kay?"

"T-thanks Kensuke. It really means alot to me right now. You want to know something?" Toji asked.

"What?" Replied Kensuke.

"You're my bestfriend. You really are." Toji brought his head up and presented a meek smile at Kensuke. They shared a moment of appreciation and relaxed on the blanket. Two friends just sat peacefully among themselves while everyone passed them by. After a while, they were fed up with the current situation.

"Hey, you wanna go outside?" Spoke Toji first.

"I thought you never ask. Let's go." Kensuke got on his feet first and helped Toji up by offering his hand. They made their way to the exit and swiftly made the way up the stairs. They were to the top floor when Toji felt a pressure in his groin.

"Hey yo. I think I'm gonna head to the bathroom first." He told Kensuke.

"Alright, I'll be waiting by the door when you get back."

He waved Toji off as he left for the bathroom. Just down the hall on the right were the bathrooms. Toji entered immediately and started emptying out. He gave a hum of satisfaction, and finished quickly. He was beginning to pull up his pants when the smell of strawberries overwhelmed him. A blur of red to his right unsettled him. He turned and saw a girl sitting on the counter. She was bathed in red. Her hair, her bodysuit. Even she seemed to leak red liquid from her wrists. Covering the surface in a soft red color.

"Who the hell are you?" Toji asked.

"What are you stupid?...Well actually, for a fact, I know you're stupid, but that's beside the point. I, yes me, came to give you a personal gift. One only you should have."

"Huh?"

It was the only thing Toji could muster at the moment. The girl was dissatisfied at the reaction. She just pointed a single finger at the wall in front of him. She held a small smile below the face of anger, the emotions mixing awkwardly. Toji peered at the urinal and found a small pocket knife on the porcelain. He pulled up his pants with one hand, and held the knife in his other.

"Look, if I can make it simple enough. That weapon is for revenge. To take back what is yours and make everything right. Use it at the right moment, baka." Toji wanted to know more. He looked at the counter to see the girl gone. Not even the liquid had remained. She was just gone. Toji glanced around in disbelief once more before exiting the bathroom. He met Kensuke at the steel doors.

"You okay? You look like you just saw a ghost?" Toji's face was white as a sheep. He held his hands in the pockets of his tuxedo.

"Y-yeah, let's just go already…" Kensuke paused at the command, but decided it best to just ignore it for now. Kensuke also had a curiosity for most things, but he respected the boundaries of others.

"Alright, be ready for an adventure then!" Kensuke had pure enjoyment on his face while he cracked open the massive doors. A sliver of sun ray lightened up the hall and showed a pair of struggling boys trying to find hope in new things. The door gave open when the boys shoved one more time. They walked outside, sun illuminating the boys, basking them in a glow like no other.

* * *

Dance For Me, My Puppet of Fate - Part 2

About half a dozen vehicles recently parked outside the broken down apartments. Most of the men stood waiting outside their cars for the Captain to show up. Some loaded their spare weapons, while others just sat in silence. Ten minutes passed before a blue sports car zoomed into the street and abruptly stopped. The car was shut off, and out came a violet hair women in a dress with a jacket. She ran up to the situation and addressed the men formally.

"What is the problem currently? She asked patiently. The main group leader made himself present and spoke to her.

"We have news that one of the pilots is situated in an apartment room in the building. We are awaiting further commands." The Captain pulled out a smartphone and checked the time. The Angel was scheduled to arrive at Tokyo 3 in twenty minutes. She didn't have time to mess around now.

"Alright, keep a alpha formation and I'll lead the squad up. Stay on my heels and watch out for any danger." She warned the men cautiously.

"Yes ma'am!" They all shouted and gave a salute. The operation was now underway. Misato checked the clip in her pistol. She signalled for the men to follow her with a nod from her head. The swiftly made for the stairs and filed in a line. Misato walked up to the floor the men had specified, and walked out the stair's doorway. She made her progress, hugging close to the wall along the way. A few doors down, Misato spotted an open door and creeped towards it. She inspected it, as she came close, and found the door to be broken. She held her hand up to tell the party to stop. She held up three fingers to tell them to move on zero.

 **One finger went down**. The men readied themselves.

 **Two fingers were now gone**. Men quietly turned off the safety of their weapons.

 **The last of the fingers disappeared**.

Misato rushed through the door and aimed her weapon around.

"Nerv personal, put your hands behind your head and desist actions!" She yelled into the small room. She swayed her gun around until she spotted a lone hand laying on the floor in the bedroom. She whispered to the men behind her.

"Check the bathroom while I check the bedroom." She commanded the men.

"Roger." The leader spoke back. Misato turned the corner to spy Shinji laying against the frame of the bed. Blood coated his lower jacket. The bed was also covered in blood. She headed for Shinji, got on a knee, and tried to wake Shinji up. He stirred at the touch, and seemed confused.

"Huh? Who? Wait, what happened?" He asked before he had a grasp on his surroundings.

"Shinji, it's me Misato. We need to leave. Are you hurt?" He just nodded his head back and forth at the question.

"Where is Rei?" This confused Misato, was he talking about the other pilot Rei Ayanami?

"She isn't here Shinji, we need to leave. Now. An Angel is heading for Nerv headquarters at this very moment." She put her arm around Shinji and helped him up. The men returned from the bathroom and made a path for the Captain to follow.

"I'll personally take him to Nerv. Make sure you clean up this mess after the Angel is gone." The men nodded and left the room one by one. Misato half carried Shinji to the nearest elevator and took him to the ground level.

"Shinji, I'm going to take you to Nerv. Okay?" His eyes were glazed over. It was like talking to a wall, but she had to make sure he was in the Eva right away. She shoved him into the passenger side of her car and put on his seatbelt. She moved around to the driver seat and started the car. Shinji and Misato drove away in a fury of speed going towards Nerv headquarters for a new battle.

* * *

"This is Captain Katsuragi, inform Dr. Akagi and staff that Shinji and I are ten minutes out. We need immediate preparation of Eva Unit One and a car elevator stat. This an high alert order. Over and out." Misato disconnected the call and pressed the gas pedal firmly. She sped down the highway leading to Nerv at a dangerous speed. On the miniature LCD in her dashboard showed the vessel of what appeared to be the 4th Angel. It was gliding over the coast defense like it was nothing. Explosions littered the side of the red monstrosity. Nothing could penetrate the shell at that rate. Satellite images weren't Misato's favorite thing to look at, but this was the only information she could get on the Angel right now. This was eerie similar to how she met Shinji the first time. She was saving him and dropping him off at Nerv. His first battle wasn't the best, but at least he survived. Only a short time later, and he was going back into another fight. The scene was still fresh in her mind of when Shinji first glanced at the Evangelion. Shinji came to Nerv demanding to see his father. Only to find out he had been killed from a recent lab experiment. He crumbled on the floor like a ragdoll. He only showed signs of life when they brought Rei out to fight. She told him it was her first fight in the Evangelion. Shinji didn't let her fight though, he interjected, instead asking to fight in her place. Everyone felt bad for Shinji then, just learned his father had abandoned him, and was meant to save the world. 'Too bad the Commander couldn't see this happening, he would set the JSSDF straight.' Misato knew the Commander probably put the forces to shame with the Eva. She had had heard so many things about the commander before she arrived at Nerv. He seemed like a cold man, but one who could get the job done. She respected that. It reminded her of the father she had once lost, but she knew better than to think of him at a time like this. She focused at the road ahead of her and kept a sane mind. She checked the screen one last time before shutting it off. Shinji started to stir in his seat, he jerked to look at Misato with eyes wide open.

"Rei! Where's Rei!" He yelled right in Misato's ear and pulled his body around to look outside the car. He started to panic in his seat at the realization of where he was at.

"Shinji, woah there. Rei isn't here. We're heading to Nerv right now." She answered as calmly as possible to make Shinji feel relaxed. He just gave up his surprise at her words and sat to look at Misato.

"I have to know where Rei is Misato, please help me. She might be in trouble." He pleaded at Misato with conviction, but Misato had more important questions, the answers have to wait.

"Actually, before I answer. I need to know something. I was informed last night that a trespasser broke into our apartment and kidnapped you. Resulting in Section 2 having to take measures against them. Why were you halfway across town in somebody's apartment this morning? What did they want with you?" Did them harm you Shinji?" She studied Shinji to make sure he was telling the truth, fixing her eyes at Shinji to make him crack. She didn't want to be tough with Shinji, but she had a right to know what happened to him. Even if he only spoke a sentence to her, that would satisfy her enough for now. His eyes unsteadily looked at her gaze. He had no idea where to start. Shinji started to think to himself in the seat. 'I don't know what to tell Misato, the truth would mean we get in trouble, and if I lied, then that might be worse.' Misato touched his shoulder to get his attention.

"Shinji, don't be afraid to tell me. I'm here for you." She felt Shinji was holding something back, but this wasn't the right time or place to put him on the spot. She would let him answer at his own pace for now.

"W-well, I guess…" Shinji started to speak but stopped in the middle to compose himself. He didn't know if he had the power to tell Misato everything, but she needed something. Misato stayed quiet and kept her eyes on the road. She tried to keep the pressure at an minimal for him. Shinji picked up where he had left off.

"They wanted to talk to me, but they realized who I am. So they tried to leave me. The person left me in the apartment. That's pretty much it." Shinji shrunk into himself after the answer and stayed speechless. He pulled his knees up on the seat and put his head between them. Misato just absorbed the information and left Shinji alone. That wasn't the entire truth, but MIsato would leave it at that. She was about to pull in for parking at the car elevator. She slowed to an appropriate speed and latched into a platform. Clicks outside the car were heard, signalling the safety grips had been applied. Misato relaxed in her seat and closed her eyes. The passenger sat in anxiety during the ride. The slow descent did calm him a little, but he was scared of the unexpected. Well not really scared, more like unnerved by it. Misato thought it be the perfect time to try and help Shinji.

"You know, this reminds me of the first time we met. We did the very same thing, riding an elevator down and such. Feels like forever ago of when that happened." Shinji was curious, if he showed up here before, what happened to him?

"Misato? What did I do when I was here?" He stared deep into her eyes for answers. Maybe even searching her soul for her long hidden secrets.

"Well, you were brought here by the Sub Commander. He sent a letter your father had written years before. You met me during the battle with the 3rd Angel. I rescued you and brought you to Nerv. While there you asked for your father, but learned he died. The next thing you know, you're throwing yourself in a battle against the Angel in the Eva. Ritsuko thought that you wanted to die in the Eva, but strange things happened that night Shinji. It was like somebody had stolen your body. Ritsuko told me that your Eva had gone Berserk, whatever that means. Anyways you defeated the Angel, but not without suffering in the process. And that's a short story of how you ended up in the hospital. I'm pretty sure you know the rest."

Shinji sat unphased, he knew a little of the backstory from Dr. Akagi, but it went deeper than he imagined. He wanted to feel something about it, but no emotion came to him. He sat in a state he couldn't describe, something along the line of being detached. So his dad and mother died in the past, and now he was apart of Nerv. He had to wonder if this was what other people his age went through. Down the tunnel, Shinji could see a faint light closing in. It sooned engulfed the car, making Shinji shield his eyes with his arm. He gasped at the sight. Below him was a whole scenery, green landscape spotted with lakes, buildings on the ground. And technology added to experience. In the middle stood a black pyramid. The entire area above had a curvature and on the top skyscrapers hung from the ceiling. Shinji was amazed. The base was located in a geofront. A real geofront. Misato laughed behind his back.

"You had the very same look the first time we came down here. Amazement was plastered on your face. Funny to see you react the same way twice." Shinji blushed slightly at her peeping at his moment. He backed away from the window and composed himself. A tuned began playing in the car. Shinji was confused by the sound, and looked at Misato for an answer. She produced a phone from her breast pocket and answered the call.

"Mhmm….Okay...Yeah, he's right here….Five minutes, gotcha. Be right there." She pressed on the phone's screen and turned to Shinji.

"As soon as we get off, Ritsuko will take us to Eva Unit One. No talking. We are in a rush. The Angel is going to arrive in 5 minutes. If we hurry, we can get you out in time."

Shinji just nodded. Minutes passed before they made the rest of the way down the elevator. They reached the bottom and met Dr. Akagi. They had a silent greeting and she guided the duo throughout Nerv. The hallways had red light flashing. Misato and Ritsuko just ignored them, but they freaked Shinji out. He had only been in this place once before, and he didn't even remember it. The group made a few turns and stopped at a changing room. Ritsuko handed Shinji a rubber suit and told him to change into it. He found a bench inside and tried to squeeze into the suit, making sure to add a headset they had given him too. He heard the sound of footsteps behind him.

"Wait, I'm not finished yet!" He yelled but somebody else answered him from behind his back.

"Nobody's ever ready, not even when death comes for you. I really hope you die out there baka. Don't make me wait anymore." A girl spoke softly to him. It was the girl. The girl in red. She whispered in his ear quietly. He didn't have time to turn around before she trapped him there. He waited until he was sure she was gone. Once he felt comfortable, he made an attempt. He looked, but nobody was there. He couldn't do this. If this girl was really this persistent, he would just try to avoid her. He didn't know how, but he had to get rid of her.

" **SHINJI**!" Misato was screaming at him from the door.

"We need to leave now, come on!"

Shinji pressed what looked like to be a button for the suit. It sucked the air away from his body and stuck to his skin tightly. He left his other clothes and rushed out the door. Misato and Ritsuko spotted him and practically dragged him away from the bathroom. They finally let him go after making a turn.

"Now Shinji, we are going to put you in a Plug, it fits in the Eva. Be prepared for stimuli from it." She left it at that and continued on her way. She ushered him through a door and left him there. Inside was a car sized tube. He inspected the rest of the room for any other thing. He slowly made his way to the tube and climbed inside. He found a seat inside and adjusted himself on it. The top of the tube sealed shut above his head. Hissing and finally latching, Shinji felt strange to be in the pod. Kinda like déjà vu. An internal picture presented itself to Shinji's left. Ritsuko's face was on the monitor.

"Alright Shinji, we're going to connect you to the Eva. Just try to keep your head clear." Ritsuko cut the line back at the command desks and started to check for any signs of pilot distress.

"How is Shinji's data?" Ritsuko asked Maya.

"He is holding steady at 45.6 percent on synchronization. Preparing to fill Entry Plug with LCL and initiate contact between Eva and Shinji."

"Okay, continue and check for feedback from the neurons. We can't have the Eva reject him at this crucial moment." Maya typed away on her keyboard while the other two assistants checked vitals on the Eva and Pilot. Ritsuko took a step back and let the desk bunnies do their jobs. She contacted Shinji's plug one last time.

"Shinji, we are going to fill the plug with liquid, don't worry. Just stay calm." At her command, Maya pressed some buttons and lifted Shinji's plug with a mechanical arm. She transported it the base of the Eva's neck and situated it there. The Eva did the rest of the job and automatically pulled the Entry Plug into the spinal column.

"Begin." Ritsuko spoke the final word to start the operation.

"Filling with LCL and electrolysing it." Over the comm could be heard Shinji's faint protests at the liquid entering.

"Just breath Shinji, the LCL is oxygenized." On a small video Shinji could be seen breathing in and out rapidly. He slowed his breathing and tried to remain calm. Flashes of color and patterns assaulted Shinji's vision. After they set, he could see a clear view of what surrounded him. Ritsuko resumed protocol at command center.

"Release locks on Eva Unit One and get it on the platform." Ritsuko left it at that and addressed Misato.

"It's all yours Captain. The Sub Commander is on leave, so you're in full command for now." Misato breathed gently and moved over to the comms. She waited until the Eva had been moved to catapult and she had the green light to go.

"Unit One, launch!" The purple creation vertically shot up the passageway. Inside Shinji was experiencing the effects of g-force on his body. It forced him down on his seat and made him clench his teeth. In a matter of moments Shinji came to abrupt stop. He was shrouded in darkness. A wall dropped and he could see buildings set before him. Misato chimed in over the speakers.

"Alright Shinji, just imagine you want to walk and you will. Take it a step at a time and you'll be fine. Off to the left in the building without windows is a gun, go and grab it."

"G-gun?" He stammered.

"Yes Shinji, how do you expect to fight?" Misato asked Shinji. He tried his best to "walk" out of the hanger. He felt like his leg moved while he sat down. Ground seemed to support his foot underneath. It was weird to Shinji. He knew that his body was right before him, but he could feel something else moving when he "moved". It was like controlling two bodies. The only example he could give if your body had a shadow of itself. He did as told and moved a little more. He walked out into the street and looked around in his Eva. He towered above some buildings and fell short of others. In the distance, near some hills leading to the ocean, was a blurry red dot. He stumbled while walking, but eventually made his way to the metallic building. Mechanical shutters rolled down to reveal a large rifle. He stuck out his hand mentally to see a giant purple and green armored hand grab the gun.

He gawked at the hand for the longest time, but soon dismissed it and picked the gun off the rack. Whatever was on the other side of the hill was fast approaching Shinji. He made sure the gun was loaded and he did his best attempt at aiming the weapon. He waited in intense anticipation. This "Angel" was taking its sweet time with him. He moved over to a building and put his back to it. The Angel glided over the hills and came to a standstill above the skyscrapers at the opposite end of Tokyo 3. He was about to unload the rifle when the Angel gave a jerk and lowered its lower body down. The Angel was like an insect. Long smooth lower body, while boasting an red sphere in the middle of its torso, and a strange oval head that came to a point in the front. Shinji wallow in fear behind the skyscraper. In the process of observing it, the beast unsheathed long glowing whips from what Shinji judged to be arms. There was no other chance for Shinji. If he didn't attack now, there would no other way for him to win. In a swift movement, he began firing at the Angel from the corner of the skyscraper.

Bullets rained on the Angel one after another. Shells dropped to the street and crushed anything in their way. Once Shinji was empty of bullets, he quickly reloaded from another clip and moved spots. Not soon after that, the skyscraper he once inhabited was cut to shreds by the whips of light. Misato was calling over the intercoms again. Shinji cut the mental link and tried to focus on the enemy. He didn't see many options to go for. The red Angel was down main and making progress towards Shinji's location. If he stayed any longer the Angel would find him. He had to make a quick battle strategy and fast. He saw that a line of low rise buildings surround the skyscrapers along main. He knew those could be used to his advantage. He would just have to wait for the perfect opportunity. Shamshel crossed to his previous skyscraper to find the enemy gone. It swayed from side to side. Not finding a battle, it gave up and started slashing at the catapult building. The armor soon gave way and an entrance presented itself. The Eva sprung from atop of a skyscraper behind the catapult and tackled Shamshel to the ground. With no delay the Eva grabbed both of the energy whips and held them in its left hand. It brought its right hand up and grabbed a Progressive Knife in the shoulder area. It pushed the knife down and wanted to pierce the Angels red orb. Shinji thought this was what the Angel's heart was since it looked so different from the rest of the body.

The blade was met with resistance. Sparks flew on the Angel and Eva. A crack appeared on the sphere. Shamshel started to thrash below the Eva. It was giving one final attempt at life before Shinji killed it. One of whips escaped his hand and struck the Eva. Shinji coughed. The pain, the pain was real. He could feel the burning whip in his gut. He lost balance on top of Shamshel and toppled over. Shamshel got up and grabbed the Eva by the wrists. It lifted him into the air and displayed him for all to see. The hole started to bleed profusely. Orange LCL poured all over the streets. Shamshel commenced to spin the Eva in a circle and began torturing it. It finished off by throwing the Eva into a hill near a bunker. Shamshel stalked towards the damaged Eva to kill it. Inside was a boy floating in pain and his own blood. He wept to himself because of his pain. Who in their right mind would stick a kid into something so dangerous and fight for their life? He thought about this while his executioner came to finish him off.

* * *

Lost among the crashing waves, a million miles away, stood the long flowing red hair of a woman stricken with voice dampening rage. Asuka stood among the deck of the "impressive UN fleet" or what the captain called it. Kaji told her that in an hour they would meet the famous Mari. But she knew something was off, halfway to the meeting with the Fourth child, half of the UN fleet broke away from the group and headed south bound. She had no idea why they be going that way, but it stirred her the wrong way. She asked Kaji about it, but he just shooed her away 'cause of "work". So here she was, standing at the edge of a battleship cursing her woes away. There were updates on the battle going on in Tokyo 3, but she paid them no attention. She knew the Third Child didn't have the courage to fight the Angel head on. She had read his report on the way. He seemed like an average Japanese male. The only thing that impressed Asuka was that he beat an Angel his very first try. But what was that compared to Asuka? She could probably dance circles around an Angel and still beat it with energy to spare. She just had to have a chance to present herself. She sighed on the inside and began to tap her fingers in frustration.

God, she had all this way to do what? To pick up a girl from America? If you asked her, she thought this whole ride was nonsense. Plus they brought her no entertainment. So what was a young lady like her meant to do? Go for a swim and hope for the best? She spent most of her time around her Eva. She practiced in the machine so much, but now she could only look at in pity. They kept it tied down and wouldn't let her take it for a test run once. Damn these stuck up navy people. They think they controlled the waters everywhere. At least the arrival of Mari gave her something to do. She expected the exchange to take any time now. Asuka had eavesdropped on a pair of Captains talking and learned that Mari would be dropped off on the sea bound destination. She had no clue why, but the men were all skeptic. They tried to avoid Asuka after the mention of Mari came aboard. Whatever. She didn't need those bastards anywho. She could tough this out and wait by herself. She watched the horizon with intent. Pretty soon, soon being a relative term, a boat swished its way into her view. The boats at the front of the formation directed to the side. A pathway cut all the way to her ship after that. The foreign ship made its way along. By the looks of it, the ship looked extensively damaged. It floated, and stopped shortly before docking with Asuka's ship. Kaji made his presence know to Asuka now.

"Will you look at that? Looks like they finally made it." He surprised Asuka but she hide it from him. He was caressing his stubble casually. Asuka admired him for that. She promised herself one day that she would claim Kaji for herself. She knew he had been trying to push her away, but she wouldn't let him escape. The sound of the ship could be heard getting closer. She found that the ship had made the final stretch and was now trying to exchange with her ship. Asuka did her best to see where this girl was, but she was nowhere in sight. She felt someone tap her shoulder and poke her back in a matter of seconds. She spun around to find a girl with glasses standing too close for comfort. Asuka was about to give the girl a word or two for being creepily close, but instead the girl put her hand out. She tipped her head to the side and acknowledged the redhead.

"Hi, I'm Mari. I just accidentally let Bethany Base, and Eva unit five, explode and I was sent here to avoid an international confrontation. What's your name?" The girl didn't even wait and pulled Asuka's hand into a formal greeting. Asuka held a mix of emotions, but she resolved it down to anger and confusion. More confusion than anger, but nonetheless a little mad about how stupid the girl was acting. She just told Mari the basics and broke the handshake quickly as possible. Kaji laughed at the awkward conversation and directed the girls to their bunks. Kaji, in the girl's confusion, grabbed a special package from the American forces and left them to deal with the accident of Bethany Base. Kaji's plan had been carried out in full detail from Gendo. His next step in the plan was a simple one, he would become the supervisor of Rei Ayanami. He would also carry out the plans his UN branch had set out before with the help of Mari.

* * *

It was hell. Not one Shinji had prepare for. He knew that he would have to fight, but no an extent of having his life taking. So is this what Nerv recruited him for? To fight their battles while he was just the punching bag? He had no clue what to do. The Eva was laying on the side of a mountain while he was recovering from the impact. His ears were ringing and his head felt like it was going to split in two.

His Eva hand felt wet from something. Blood? He couldn't tell at this moment. All he could tell was that the 4th Angel, Shamshel, was coming in from Tokyo 3 to kill him. His vision was blurry, but a red smear presented itself there. He was coming to finally. He noticed that a chat screen had been open while in a pain induced haze. Nobody was on the screen. He heard faint whispers that emerged as a person talking to him. It was Misato, her voice was scratchy and offsetting, but he heard it enough.

"Shinji, can you hear me? Please respond."

"Y-yes Misato." Shinji could hear the faint sobbing in the background of somebody else.

"I know this is a lot to handle, but I'm going to open the Entry Plug for somebody before the Angel comes at you. Please, for the love of god, don't look around Shinji." Somebody? Who was this somebody? He didn't look, but he would have known if a person was near him. Actually...he never looked around for anyone below him. Misato told him to not snoop, but curiosity got the best of him. He checked around his hands first. That was when he spotted it. A blood bath was right below his left hand. A boy with light brown hair had been crushed with his hand. The boy's head and arm was still sticking out from under it. He was lifeless. Nonmoving.

As he watched, the blood kept coming, it washed the grass below the boy. His life was seeping out. This didn't stop the attempts of a black haired boy in a tuxedo. He pulled on the boy's arm and touched his face. The boy was screaming at the top of his lungs. Shinji could only watch in horror. He had inadvertently killed a boy with his own hands. He felt dirty inside. Shinji cried for the boy and himself. That was when his Entry Plug opened for the boy in the tux. The adults shouted at the boy over the radio. He refused and tried to stay with the boy on the ground. They finally convinced him if they defeated the Angel early, that the medics could heal the boy and help them. He gave one last look at his friend and then climbed up the Eva. Shinji was ashamed that the people had to tell a lie to get the boys apart. The boy was in shock, and he couldn't accept that fact that his friend was killed in cold blood. Shinji blamed himself. He didn't even blame anyone else, he did wrong when he joined Nerv just because he wanted answers. The boy reached the plug and settled in. He wiped away tears and hid behind Shinji's seat. Shinji waiting until the plug closed and resumed his battle mentality.

The scene unfolded like a tale of tragedy. Shamshel reached the Eva before they could run. It shot whips in his chest and wrapped one around his leg. Shinji coughed and screamed. Pain and adrenaline was flowing through his body. He tugged at the whip in his chest at no avail. He moved down to the one on his leg and stabbed it with his Prog Knife. Purple blood washed on his leg. The creature gave an otherworldly screech at the pain, but didn't stop the effort to kill him. Shinji gouged the knife in deeper and jerked the whip away. With the whip badly damaged, he ripped away from the Angel and severed the whip. It wanted to back away from his Eva, but Shinji pressed on. The plug became extremely hot, Shinji guessed that the whip was heating up the insides of the Eva. He still felt every inch of pain, but Shinji had to go on. If he quit now, that boy would have died in vein. He had to give his all for that boy's life.

Shinji shoved the Angel down the mountain slowly. He was in a struggle of life and death with the Angel. The whip he had destroyed was regenerating at a fast pace. If he didn't act quick, both occupants would be dead. He rapidly struck the knife in the Angel's side to damage it. While it did hurt the Angel, it wasn't enough. The whip regeneration ended and it stabbed him in the chest along with the other whip. Inside the plug, Shinji's lower half of the plug started to melt and he spotted a small pink glow. With death iminate, he found an opening and went for the Angel's orb again. It clicked into the earlier cut and made progress. Cracks spider webbed on the sphere. The whips melted through the plug and LCL started to drain. His view went dark from the Entry Plug failure. Steam formed from the LCL and hot whips mixing. But everything stopped.

His Entry Plug shut down along with the Eva. The whips turned into a black substance and lost heat. Outside was silent. The Angel had quit producing sound and nothing could be heard. Inside was a mess. Both Shinji and the boy were heaving and panting. Shinji tried to stay awake, but the pain and recent struggle made him black out. He reached out for the boy, but only found empty air in his place. Shinji gave up and slumped in his chair. The sound of hissing could be heard and light occupied the plug. Birds were chirping, the wind was howling, trees rustled. Everything sounded like peace had reclaimed the land.

* * *

Shinji first spotted the boy in the tuxedo trying hold his lifeless friend. He was crying for the boy. He whispered to the boy occasionally.

"Why did you have to leave me Kensuke? Especially when Sakura just left" The boy crumbled at his questions and shed tears on the person in his arms. Shinji wanted to get up, but his legs didn't listen. His whole body was weak. He sat up and watched the boy cry in silence. He eventually let his emotions dwindle. Only keeping it to slight pants here and there. He set the boy down and look at Shinji. He looked...empty. His face was emotionless, despite the red puffy eyes he had from crying. He smeared tears off his face and got up. He watched Shinji with every move. He made his way over and sat down.

"Were you the pilot that battled the Angel the other day?" HIs question was cold an precise. It chilled Shinji, but he had to answer.

"Y-yes, but I…" Shinji couldn't finish his sentence because the boy grabbed what he could on Shinji and pulled him up hastily. His feet had problems with staying up, but he gained footing after a second. The boy was instilled with rage, and he made it clear to Shinji.

"Do you remember seeing a little girl during your first battle?! Tell me!" He yelled right in Shinji's face. Shinji sputtered out words.

"I-I'm, s-sorry...I don't remember anything…" He hung his head at the comment and started to back away from the boy. The boy wasn't letting up on Shinji. He kept the grasp on Shinji and pulled him back.

"Well guess what? While you might not remember her, but you killed my little sister in that battle! She was hit by falling rubble. They collected her after the battle and operated on her. She died two days ago! Two Days! And now I'm looking at the person who's responsible! On top of that, I just witnessed with my own eyes the death of my best friend! Do you know how it feels to see the life drain from someone's eyes! DO YOU?" He shoved Shinji in his blind rage and was about to pull a punch when someone caught his arm. Two men from Nerv retrieval squad restrained him by the arms. Toji started to thrash and fight in their hold.

"No please! I'm doing this for Sakura! For Kensuke! Please let me have a moment! Please!" He elbowed a man in the gut and escaped the other. He ran at Shinji with full force. But Shinji didn't see it time. Something metallic was in his hands. He felt a jab in his gut and something inside him. Both boys looked down to spot blood drip from his suit. A knife had cut him. Toji pulled the knife to his side and cut open Shinji's stomach. Blood began to spill everywhere. Toji looked at Shinji, he was scared. He only did this on a rash impulse, but was starting to regret it. Toji didn't want this, but his mind was so clouded with rage. The only thing in his mind was revenge, but now he wanted forgiveness. Shinji coughed blood on Toji's face and swayed backwards. His last words were…

"I'm sorry."

Shinji crashed to the ground in an explosion of blood and empathy. The sounds of shouting could be heard while gunshots followed immediately after. Two boys were casted on the ground. One dead. The other blacking out from blood loss. Shinji felt cold. He stared into the boy's eyes one last time. His eyes were husks. He saw nothing but emptiness. Shinji shut his eyelids and dreamed one final time.

* * *

Everything was bathed in white. The landscape was white as snow. Waves could be heard softly touching the edges of land. Shinji Ikari was in this place. A paradise with no scenery. He was standing in the eternal white. He had no clue of how he arrived. He desperately searched his body to find any indication that he was hurt. His wasn't even in his skin tight suit anymore. He had regular school clothes on. He made sure to soothe himself. Nothing was really close by in this...dream? Shinji could only muster this up as a dream. Everything felt too real though. It was surreal and vivid to him.

'Am I dead?' Shinji pondered to himself. The sound of laughter was heard from behind Shinji's back. He turned to find a headless statue with a grey haired boy sitting atop of it. Shinji put his feet outwards to go and talk to him when he felt the sensation of cold water wash into his shoes. He jumped back from shock. Shinji's shoes were definitely wet, but he couldn't see water anywhere. He thought he had just stepped in white. The boy laughed gently at Shinji's confusion. He looked at Shinji with an easy smile. One that was sincere and thoughtful.

"Who are you? God?" Shinji asked unknowingly. The boy continued to have a little chuckle at Shinji. He made his way off the statue and descended over to Shinji. He grabbed Shinji's head and placed in his hands. Shinji's ears became deaf. Sound was not available to him. Waves rolled in his head. Soft waves touched his inner thinkings while images presented themselves thoroughly. It was Kaworu, he recognized him now. More things came to Shinji. Pieces started to click inside his head. Pictures were the only evidence, but he knew these feelings to be real.

He was showed all the Angel. The battles. Kaworu was training his vision into Shinji, he was showing him what he used to be. Shinji glanced through his own eyes into this other world he had once lived. His father was living in this time and place. Bitter tastes and broken feelings surrounded his mental images. Shinji moved on to Rei. She had a different personality to the Rei he currently knew. This one was cold and placid there. She carried her life thinking of others, but looking down on her own. Shinji flinched physically at the invading images. He wanted to leave Kaworu's hold, but Kaworu wouldn't let him go. Asuka…

The redhead played around in his flowerfield of feelings. She cause him anger, happiness, embarrassment, and a whole array of more. And she only did this by being in his life. In the last moment of when she talked to Shinji in his world, she held the fiery passion he had come to know her for. It was bittersweet to view Asuka like this. He figured out her problems by just observing her. If only Shinji had done this when he was with her. He reflected on their time and moved on. Kaworu backed away from Shinji and eyed him with intent.

"Do you remember the plan now? The plan that required so much bloodshed and sacrifice?"

"Yes, I-I'm sorry. I didn't know this would happen to me." Shinji was in despair with the apology, but for the longest time had nobody to share it with. Kaworu held Shinji in a hug at his shown depression. The day the plan had occurred kept repeating itself in Shinji's memories. Kaworu had arrived early from SEELE and helped pilot Asuka's Evangelion. His Eva was held on lockdown from when it consumed the S2 engine of Zeruel. In the battle with Armisael, both Kaworu and Rei survived with grave injuries, but were able to recover.

Rei, having discovered the plans that both SEELE and Nerv were going to set out, talked to Shinji and Kaworu about making their own plan. The plan, although sounding harsh, was to have Adam and Lilith bond together with the help of Rei and Kaworu. Shinji and his Eva would act as the deciding factor and go back to a time where everything could be done right. The plan eventually failed. Gendo discovered Rei had stolen Adam and killed her before she reached Central Dogma. With Rei gone, Kaworu and Shinji picked up where Rei left off and merged the body of a substitute clone.

Kaworu proceed to protect the giant, ambient, conjured Rei. That was when Gendo activated the dummy plug system in Eva unit One. He was forced to kill Kaworu. Kaworu's choices were slim then. He decided to sacrifice both moons of Adam and Lilith. The destruction was untold. The world crumbled by having no god to control it. With the last of his power, Kaworu saved Shinji as the world burned to nothing. The trauma was too great for Shinji, he lost bits of his memory one by one. His will to live had diminished and he had returned to his old self. Kaworu used the sacrifice of the world to push Shinji into another world. And this is where Shinji and Kaworu found themselves now. Kaworu comforted Shinji until he was ready to bring himself back from the recurring memories. Something was off with Shinji, even though he understood what had happened, a part of the prevailing story was missing.

"Kaworu, I know that you and me are the only people to make it from this other world, but...but why is Asuka still with me? I thought she vanished like everyone else?" Shinji stared questionably into Kaworu's eyes.

"She is the sin upon your soul. The blood among your hands. She is the proof of your mortal mistakes and won't leave until you give in to guilt. She will drain your life, until every part of your soul is gone, then she will be pleased. You have to cast her out, and leave the fire of her soul alone. She has come to reclaim you Shinji."

"But, how can I do that? How can I let Asuka die? I can't do that to her…" Kaworu put his hand up to Shinji's jawline and tenderly held it up. His gaze was meant to speak with Shinji's soul.

"While I might not be the key, you can be the person that sets us free of our worldly troubles. Do this for her, not against her. This is what truly her heart wants, to be filled with love from one she desires." Kaworu faded to white with the world. Shinji felt his time had been up. He waited for the next chapter in his life to turn about. Kaworu mutted into his ears.

"I will never leave you, my place will be in the throne of your heart. Hold dear to your feelings and never let them erode, or consume you. Goodbye, for now, Shinji." He shut Shinji's eyes closed and hummed a toon in his ear. It was Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, Fourth Movement. Shinji knew the melody by heart. Kaworu had taught Shinji things he could never forget. He would hold them dear. Shinji would present what he learned for the whole world to know. Nothing could stop him now.

* * *

End Chapter

* * *

Kaworu has fixed the world, but will it be enough for Shinji? Later on, the mystery of the enigma that inhabits Mari is explored. Meanwhile the Commander treats Rei to unfathomable conditions. More reveals and fanservice, come read it next time on "Chapter Four - Baptism by Fire"!

* * *

Hello there. Sorry to say, but chapters from here on out might come with more pauses in between. School is about to start and I have to juggle that with a job. On a little note tho, I was listening to Stacy's Mom by Fountains Of Wayne sometime ago. Somewhere along the way I was also thinking of the fanfic plot. The two inter tangled and the result was… "She's all I want and I've waited for so long. Asuka, can't you see you're just not the girl for me. I know it might be wrong but I'm in love with Shinji's mom! Ikari's mom has got it goin' on!" I kinda found it funny when I realized my slipup. Thank you so much for reading this. This is also a very rough chapter so I'll fix it some other time. See ya later!


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